NOVEMBER 28, 1978

Full News Archive

• Headline: NYC Resumes Curb Repairs with Council Support. Impact: This curb repair initiative led to an explosion of DIY home improvement shows, where homeowners learned the hard way that a 'simple curb repair' can lead to a backyard swimming pool no one wanted.. Fact: The NYC Highway Department spending $1 million on curb repairs is like your kid finding a dollar in the couch and deciding to buy a yacht..
• Headline: Rev. Moon Defends Unification Church. Impact: Rev. Moon's ire against the media led to a dramatic increase in cults using 'not a cult' as their official tagline, which still exists today—thanks for that!. Fact: If Rev. Moon had a dollar for every time someone compared him to a cult, he’d probably still be outraged and need a new PR team..
• Headline: China Buys More Corn. Impact: China’s corn purchases paved the way for the global corn market to thrive, which later contributed to a world obsessed with popcorn at movie theaters.. Fact: When they say 'corn is king,' they clearly haven't seen a corn maze. Those things are a royal pain to navigate..
• Headline: Warner Is Winner by 0.4% In the Virginia Senate Race. Impact: Warner's narrow victory highlighted the absurdity of American elections, leading to the phrase 'every vote counts' becoming a national joke—because it really does, but only if the counting is right.. Fact: In Virginia, losing a close election is just an expensive way to learn that recounts can cost you more than your car insurance..
• Headline: 9 Named to Monuments Panel. Impact: The formation of the Monuments Panel symbolized the government's attempt to preserve history, which ultimately became the bureaucratic equivalent of holding a paperweight.. Fact: Being on a monuments panel is like being a celebrity in a reality show; the fame is all about the past, and nobody remembers your next move..
• Headline: Short‐Term Rates Climb As Fed Lets Funds Rise. Impact: The Fed's decision to raise short-term rates sent shockwaves through the economy, inadvertently inspiring countless memes about 'interest' being the most boring topic ever.. Fact: Raising interest rates is like getting a haircut while your bank account is on a diet—it’s a painful adjustment that nobody appreciates..
• Headline: DR. DANIEL KIMBERG, INTERNIST, 45, DEAD. Impact: Dr. Kimberg's untimely death reminded the medical community of the fragility of life, prompting more doctors to embrace a work-life balance, which meant more golf and less night shifts.. Fact: Being an internist is tough; it's the only profession where your patients expect you to know everything but still blame you for them getting sick..
• Headline: Frank Rosolino, Jazz Trumpeter. Impact: Rosolino's tragic end sparked a national conversation about mental health in the arts, leading to the creation of support groups for jazz musicians who just wanted to play the blues.. Fact: Jazz trumpeters have a reputation for high drama—who knew they were also auditioning for a role in the next tragic opera?.
• Headline: Carter Acts to Double Quota of Vietnamese Allowed to Enter U.S.. Impact: Carter's decision to double the quota for Vietnamese refugees transformed America's cultural landscape, leading to the ultimate fusion of Vietnamese cuisine and American fast food—thank you, banh mi food trucks!. Fact: Carter's compassion was so on point that it set the standard for future administrations—who knew humanitarianism could be a hot political topic?.