JUNE 23, 1978

Full News Archive

• Headline: Equality in Organization Membership. Impact: This Chicago chap's withdrawal sparked a movement that led to women finally getting a say in organizations. Who knew that a single pout could ripple through time and push for gender equality? Next thing you know, women are running for president!. Fact: Women were allowed to join the organization... eventually. Because equality is all about taking your sweet time, right?.
• Headline: Amoco's Drilling Ventures in Great Salt Lake. Impact: The oil drilling in the Great Salt Lake turned out to be a slippery slope. Who knew that a $5.5 million investment would lead to an environmental mess that would have future generations crying over their dry lakes and polluted ecosystems?. Fact: Fun fact: That lake is now known as the Great Salt Sludge. Just kidding, but it could be if we keep this up!.
• Headline: Retail Sales Surge in May 2023. Impact: A 13.3% rise in retail sales led to the great consumerism epidemic of the late 20th century. This headline is basically the moment when America said, 'More stuff, please!' and the planet collectively sighed.. Fact: Retail therapy was not yet a recognized term, but it was definitely a thing. Just ask your credit card bill..
• Headline: Art: Still Lifes and Toys. Impact: Art critics debating still lifes and toys paved the way for future generations to take art way too seriously. Thanks to this event, we now have to pretend to understand abstract art while secretly thinking, 'I could do that with a crayon.'. Fact: Spoiler alert: The toys were more interesting than the still lifes. But who would admit that at an art gallery, right?.
• Headline: London Auction Sets Record: $13 Million of Art in a Day. Impact: This record-breaking auction set a precedent that led to modern-day 'art as investment' culture, where people now buy million-dollar paintings not for beauty, but as a flex. Thanks, Robert von Hirsch!. Fact: At that price, you'd think the art would come with a lifetime supply of pretentious commentary..
• Headline: Jaycees Swap Views and Badges. Impact: The Jaycees swapping views and badges was the start of every awkward networking event that would follow. This headline is basically the genesis of ‘Let's pretend to be friends while we promote our agenda’ culture.. Fact: Barry Kennedy probably still has that badge and tells everyone he was elected president. Because why not?.
• Headline: Bunker Hill, by One Who Was There. Impact: This letter revealing details about the Battle of Bunker Hill became a historical artifact that made historians geek out over the drama of the American Revolution, proving that even back then, people loved a good story.. Fact: Martin Gay probably never imagined his letter would be worth more than his entire life savings. Talk about a plot twist!.
• Headline: Gasoline Ration Plan For a Crisis. Impact: The gasoline ration plan set a precedent for future energy crises, reminding us that humans will always find a way to argue over gas prices—right up until the end of time.. Fact: When they say 'gas prices are going up,' they really mean 'everyone's going to panic and hoard toilet paper again.'.
• Headline: Advertisting. Impact: Liberty Mutual’s sponsorship of adventure specials was the catalyst for every insurance company thinking they could appeal to millennials by pretending to be cool. Spoiler alert: it didn’t work.. Fact: Because nothing says 'adventure' like a 15% discount on your car insurance. Exciting, right?.
• Headline: Court Broadens Right of Unions To Distribute Pamphlets in Plants. Impact: The Supreme Court's decision on unions set off a chain reaction, empowering labor movements that would forever change the workplace. Who would have thought pamphlets could pack such a punch?. Fact: Before this, workers were like, 'Can I have my pamphlet, please?' Now they can just throw them at you! Progress!.