MAY 22, 1977

Full News Archive

• Headline: Fathers Fighting for Custody Rights. Impact: As divorced fathers rallied for custody, a butterfly flapped its wings and suddenly, every sitcom in the 90s featured a dad trying to figure out parenting while dealing with a comedic mishap. Thanks for the emotional rollercoaster, guys!. Fact: In the grand scheme of parenting advice, 'conviction, courage, and cash' sounds more like a self-help book for hedge fund managers than actual dads..
• Headline: Lilco's Annual Emergency Preparedness Test. Impact: When Lilco held a test for an emergency that never happened, it set off a chain reaction of overprepared local governments everywhere. Now, every time it rains, cities are deploying emergency plans for a 'possible' drizzle.. Fact: The ice storm preparedness drill was so convincing that the staff actually brought in hot cocoa as emergency rations. Because nothing says 'prepared' like hot chocolate during a fake emergency..
• Headline: Crash Course on Insurance. Impact: The lax insurance laws in Connecticut led to a future where every car owner suddenly became an expert in excuses for why they didn't have coverage, resulting in the world's longest list of creative rationalizations.. Fact: In Connecticut, being pulled over without insurance is like showing up to a fancy dinner in sweatpants—nobody wants to see it, but you know someone will..
• Headline: Cotton Tradiffg Comes to Asia. Impact: The introduction of cotton trading in Asia led to a cotton revolution. Who knew that trading futures could influence more than just the price of your favorite t-shirt?. Fact: If you think cotton futures are exciting, wait until you hear about the thrilling world of sock futures. Spoiler: It involves a lot of toe puns..
• Headline: Numbers Have Sharply Increased in the 70's. Impact: The rise in voluntary sterilization trends spurred a secret society of people who just wanted to get a good night's sleep without worrying about unexpected kids. Their motto? 'Less is more... sleep, that is.'. Fact: Seven million sterilizations sound like a lot, but don't worry—plenty of people still think 'just one more' is a good idea. Spoiler alert: It's not..
• Headline: THE ECONOMIC SCENE. Impact: Access to SEC files sparked a massive wave of conspiracy theories about the government hiding important information, including why they still haven’t found the missing socks from the laundry.. Fact: The SEC files are like your high school diary—full of secrets that seem really important until you read them years later and realize it was just about who had a crush on whom..
• Headline: President to Ask Broader System Of U.S. Alliances. Impact: Carter's push for broader alliances led to a complex web of international friendships, where countries became like that one friend who keeps inviting everyone to hang out even when no one knows why.. Fact: Carter's diplomatic charm could have actually made 'The Bachelor' a reality show for world leaders. 'Will you accept this alliance?'.
• Headline: The Case That Will Not Die. Impact: The Sacco and Vanzetti case continues to haunt the legal system, proving that sometimes, even after 50 years, justice can still be the ultimate ghost story.. Fact: Calling it 'The Case That Will Not Die' is a bit dramatic, but it’s better than 'The Case That Just Won't Go Away'—which sounds like a bad sequel no one asked for..