DECEMBER 31, 1976

Full News Archive

• Headline: Thaddeus Stevens: Champion of Equality. Impact: If Thaddeus Stevens had never championed public education and black emancipation, we might still be living in a world where the only requirement for voting is owning property—good luck finding a place to park your horse and buggy!. Fact: Amy Carter attending a school named after Stevens is like the ultimate game of historical tag; who knows who else might pop up in the education system next!.
• Headline: Governor Pardons Attica Uprising Inmates. Impact: Pardoning those seven inmates may have sent ripples of relief, but it also opened the floodgates for future governors to think they could just 'close the book' on anything—like their own scandals.. Fact: Attica was such a hot topic that it even inspired a Broadway musical—just kidding, but wouldn’t that be a fun twist on prison reform?.
• Headline: Custer in the Dock—Where the Witness Stand is the Last One. Impact: Custer in the dock might have been the first sign that accountability in leadership could become a thing. The fact that it took this long is a real testament to how much we love a good scapegoat.. Fact: Witness stands have come a long way since Custer—now they have comfy chairs and coffee breaks. Custer probably just had a log to sit on..
• Headline: WARNING ON SEALANT REVISED BY NEW YORK. Impact: The sealant warning could have sent shockwaves through the DIY community, leading to the 90s obsession with 'safe' home renovations that somehow still ended with a lot of questionable choices.. Fact: Isn’t it funny how we need to be warned about sealants, but not about the questionable choices we make in our home décor?.
• Headline: School Finance Law Upset in California; Spur to Reform Seen. Impact: This ruling in California sparked a nationwide rethink on school funding—who knew a little legal drama could change the way we fund education? Next stop: Netflix documentary!. Fact: California's education system is so convoluted, it makes trying to understand a tax return look like a children’s book..
• Headline: The Decline Of Dogmatism. Impact: The decline of dogmatism in Washington may have inadvertently created a space for all the conspiracy theories to flourish—no one can hold a strong opinion if they’re busy doubting everything!. Fact: Self-doubt in politics is like a unicorn sighting; it’s rare and probably not real..
• Headline: A Modern Inquisition. Impact: Questioning the jailing of Shinnick paved the way for future journalists to consider the line between freedom of speech and getting locked up for it—a real nail-biter!. Fact: If questioning authority were an Olympic sport, Shinnick would have taken home the gold. Too bad there’s no medal for that!.
• Headline: Rededication to Freedom. Impact: This rededication to freedom may have inadvertently inspired a generation of activists who turned out to be the most annoying relatives at Thanksgiving dinners.. Fact: Freedom is great and all, but it’s also the reason every family gathering turns into a debate club..
• Headline: Kepone Worker Suits Are Settled Out of Court With Judge's Backing. Impact: Settling out of court for the Kepone workers could have led to future companies thinking they could just buy their way out of problems—spoiler alert: they were right.. Fact: Kepone was such a toxic chemical that it could probably win an award for 'Most Likely to Ruin a Family BBQ.'.