JUNE 28, 1976

Full News Archive

• Headline: Danny Kalb's Reunion Concert. Impact: Danny Kalb's return with a four-piece band sparked a musical revolution that ultimately led to the rise of karaoke in living rooms worldwide. Thank you, Danny, for making our family gatherings an auditory nightmare.. Fact: Did you know that four-piece bands were initially just an excuse for one person to avoid carrying the heavy equipment? Efficiency at its finest!.
• Headline: Tragic Train Derailment in Belgium. Impact: This train derailment event set off a chain reaction that inspired the creation of the first 'Amtrak Safety Dance'—a dance so bad it was banned in five countries. Who knew that tragedy could lead to such questionable entertainment?. Fact: Did you know that trains were once considered the safest form of transportation? Clearly, someone didn't get the memo before this incident..
• Headline: New Yorkers Reclaim Their Beaches. Impact: The reopening of Jones Beach resulted in a massive increase in sunscreen sales, leading to the invention of SPF 5000. The world is now a safer place for pale individuals, thanks to this beach reclamation.. Fact: Did you know that before this beach reopening, the term 'beach body' referred to a body that could survive the pollution? Talk about setting the bar low!.
• Headline: O.A.U. Denies Soweto Riot Was Tied to Kissinger Visit. Impact: The denial of the connection between the Soweto riot and Kissinger's visit somehow led to a new conspiracy theory involving time-traveling diplomats. It’s a wild ride through history that we never saw coming.. Fact: Did you know that Kissinger once tried to negotiate peace using only origami? Spoiler alert: it didn’t work..
• Headline: Thousands Join in March For Homosexuals’ Rights. Impact: This monumental march for homosexuals’ rights paved the way for the invention of glitter bombs, which are now used in all forms of celebration and protest. Thank you, 800,000 fabulous people, for making the world a shinier place!. Fact: Did you know that the first pride parades were just a way for people to wear sequins in public without judgment? Fashion for a cause!.
• Headline: Airlines Using Buses For Canada Traffic. Impact: The combined airplane and bus transportation model led to the rise of the modern-day 'road trip' trend—where friends gather to argue over playlists and bathroom breaks. The real tragedy is all the snacks left behind.. Fact: Did you know that the first bus trip from NYC to Canada was filled with people who had no idea what a poutine was? Poor souls!.
• Headline: Mrs. Grasso Holds Up Plans for Hidden Mikes. Impact: Mrs. Grasso's concern over privacy led to the eventual rise of the 'smart home'—where now we all live in fear of our toasters eavesdropping on us. Thanks for the paranoia, Mrs. Grasso!. Fact: Did you know that hidden microphones were originally invented for spy movies? Now they just spy on your Netflix choices..
• Headline: Ford's Jersey Leader Warns on Reagan. Impact: Thomas H. Kean's warning about Reagan's impact on the NJ Republican party set off a chain reaction of overly dramatic political predictions, ultimately leading to the invention of the phrase 'the sky is falling' in political debates.. Fact: Did you know that political warnings are just the adult version of 'if you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up'? Still waiting to see if that one works..
• Headline: Korshak's Power Rooted In Ties to Labor Leaders. Impact: Sidney Korshak's influence on labor leaders transformed the casino industry into what we now call 'Las Vegas,' where fortunes are made and lost faster than you can say 'what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.'. Fact: Did you know that the first casino was basically just a glorified poker game held in a barn? Glamorous, right?.