AUGUST 14, 1974

Full News Archive

• Headline: New York Taxi Fare Agreement Reached. Impact: Imagine if taxi fares had skyrocketed by 25%—people would have started using rollerblades for transport. We’d have a whole generation of urban athletes, and the Olympics would have featured a new event: 'Taxi Dodging'.. Fact: In 1973, a simple cab ride could cost you about as much as a coffee today. Talk about inflation—at this rate, we’d need a loan to hail a cab!.
• Headline: Guard at Watergate To Get S.C.L.C. Honor. Impact: Frank Wills, the guard, gets an award, and suddenly everyone thinks being a security guard is the next big thing. Cue the flood of wannabe guards who think they’re the next superhero in the making!. Fact: Frank Wills’ discovery of the break-in was the start of a series of events that eventually led to a whole new definition of 'political drama'..
• Headline: Kennedy Concedes Aide Erred Under Campaign Law. Impact: Kennedy’s little slip-up led to a whirlwind of campaign finance reforms that would confuse politicians for decades. It's like they set up a 'how not to fundraise' handbook for future generations.. Fact: Isn’t it ironic? The guy pushing for campaign finance reform got caught in a campaign finance scandal. Just when you thought politics couldn’t get any messier!.
• Headline: Maddox Forced Into Runoff for Georgia Governor. Impact: Maddox’s runoff became a political soap opera, inspiring future candidates to turn their campaigns into reality TV. Who needs the Kardashians when you have gubernatorial drama?. Fact: Runoffs are essentially just a second chance to mess things up. Think of it as the political equivalent of a do-over!.
• Headline: Baltazar Sets Pace For Jockeys. Impact: Baltazar’s victory in a horse race probably led to a surge in bets on future races, which would eventually make horse racing more popular than reality TV. Who knew jockeys could be trendsetters?. Fact: Winning a race at Yonkers Raceway sounds glamorous, but let’s be honest, it’s just a bunch of people yelling at horses to go faster. Classic!.
• Headline: NAVY BID TO MAKE LOAN TO GRUMMAN BEATEN IN SEE. Impact: The Navy's rejection of the loan means Grumman has to tighten its belt, leading to innovations in military technology that may have inadvertently saved the world from a robot apocalypse. You're welcome.. Fact: Senator Proxmire was like the 'No' guy of the Senate. If he had a dollar for every time he said no, he might have been able to fund the Navy’s F-14 program himself!.