MARCH 23, 1973

Full News Archive

• Headline: Laotian Negotiations Reach Stalemate. Impact: When Sipraseuth left, he inadvertently caused a butterfly effect that would lead to a generation of diplomats using 'impasse' as their go-to excuse for not getting anything done. To this day, negotiations often stall because someone is too busy staring out a window contemplating the meaning of life instead of the meaning of 'compromise.'. Fact: The word 'impasse' comes from French, meaning 'dead end'—a fitting description for many negotiations since then..
• Headline: ITT Officials Clash Over Chile Fund Intentions. Impact: The conflicting testimonies revealed during this hearing sparked a secret society called 'The Conflicted Testifiers' dedicated to creating confusion in all future congressional hearings. They now hold annual meetings to discuss how to maintain their reputation for utter ambiguity.. Fact: ITT stands for International Telephone & Telegraph, but let's be honest, they might as well have stood for 'Incredibly Tenuous Testimonies.'.
• Headline: Furniss Sets U.S Record in 200‐Yard Medley. Impact: Furniss' record-setting swim inspired a generation of couch potatoes to believe they, too, could achieve great things—if only they could find the remote without getting up.. Fact: The 200-yard medley is like the triathlon of swimming; it combines all four strokes, which is what most of us do when we try to swim away from our responsibilities..
• Headline: BILINGUAL BALLOT ORDERED BY COURT. Impact: This court order was the first domino in a long line of events that led to everyone realizing that maybe, just maybe, understanding your democracy shouldn’t require a Rosetta Stone.. Fact: Bilingual ballots are a big deal; they ensure that when you vote, you can at least pretend to understand what you’re doing in two languages!.
• Headline: STATE ACTS TO SAVE CON EDISON TALKS. Impact: The intervention by the NYS Mediation Board was a pivotal moment; it inspired future mediators to believe they could hold back the flood of utility strikes by simply showing up with a coffee and some passive-aggressive small talk.. Fact: Con Edison has been mediating between unions and management longer than most of us have been alive—proving that some things are just more about keeping the lights on than actually working it out..
• Headline: Pennsylvania Court Adopts Bar's Curbs On Pretrial News. Impact: The Pennsylvania Court's ruling on pretrial news influenced a slew of media regulations, leading to the birth of the phrase 'no comment' as a legal strategy, which has since become the gold standard for avoiding accountability.. Fact: This ruling basically made 'no comment' the legal equivalent of 'I don’t want to talk about it'—perfect for when your parents ask why you're still single..
• Headline: SECOND CONTRACTOR ACCUSED OF PEONAGE. Impact: The arrest of J Thomas for peonage highlighted the pervasive issues of labor exploitation in the U.S., creating ripples that would eventually lead to movements advocating for workers' rights, even if the fight still feels like it's going nowhere at times.. Fact: Peonage is a form of involuntary servitude that sounds like it could be a trendy new therapy technique, but unfortunately, it’s a real issue that has haunted labor practices for centuries..