OCTOBER 19, 1971

Full News Archive

• Headline: Hijacking Incident on Alaska Flight. Impact: This incident sparked a surge in flight security measures, eventually leading to the invention of the TSA's infamous pat-downs. Who knew a hijacking could result in millions of people being fondled at airports for decades to come?. Fact: Did you know that the first rule of hijacking is to always have a backup plan? Apparently, D L Thomas missed that memo..
• Headline: Exploring Literary Critique in 1950s. Impact: This book review probably inspired countless people to never read again, solidifying the stereotype that reading is for nerds. Thanks for that, Peter De Vries!. Fact: Did you know that most people only read the first chapter of a book and then pretend to understand the whole thing? This review might just be the reason why..
• Headline: Protests Against Kosygin in Ottawa. Impact: The protest showed just how passionate people can be about political issues, which led to future protests that were far less effective but way more Instagrammable. #Freedom!. Fact: Did you know that shouting things in public places is a long-standing tradition for making your voice heard? Someone should tell the politicians that!.
• Headline: U.N. CHINA DEBATE OPENS WITH TAIPEI AND THE U.S. SPLIT. Impact: This debate set the stage for decades of diplomatic awkwardness between the U.S., China, and Taiwan. Think of it as a never-ending episode of 'As the World Turns' but with more sanctions.. Fact: Did you know that arguing about who should represent China has been a thing since before most of us were born? Spoiler alert: it still isn't resolved..
• Headline: An Aopraisal. Impact: The analysis of these festivities inadvertently encouraged nations to seek international recognition through increasingly extravagant celebrations, thus leading to the modern-day Olympics. Because nothing says 'we're a country' like synchronized swimming!. Fact: Did you know that the French executed a lot of people? Apparently, that didn't come up in the festivities; talk about an awkward party theme!.
• Headline: MINUTEMEN CASE IS DROPPED HERE. Impact: Dropping this case paved the way for right-wing groups to operate with impunity, eventually leading to a whole series of events that would inspire future conspiracy theorists to take themselves too seriously.. Fact: Did you know that the Minutemen have nothing to do with time travel? They just wanted to be taken seriously, but clearly, they missed the mark on that one..
• Headline: PRINCE LAUDS U.S. ON CLEANUP WORK. Impact: This moment of praise led to a false sense of environmental accomplishment that lulled the public into ignoring impending climate disasters. Because who needs to worry when a prince gives you a gold star?. Fact: Did you know that getting a gold medal from a prince is like getting a participation trophy? Nice, but it doesn’t really change the world..
• Headline: Police Report Smashing of 3 Auto‐Theft Rings. Impact: The dismantling of these rings led to a temporary drop in car thefts, which in turn gave thieves the time to rethink their life choices and come up with even more creative ways to steal cars later on.. Fact: Did you know that stealing cars is a crime? Shocking, I know! But apparently, some people just can’t resist a shiny new ride..
• Headline: Bonn Asks Surtax Data. Impact: This inquiry into surtax data led to endless debates about taxes, which ultimately made everyone realize that discussing money is the quickest way to ruin a dinner party.. Fact: Did you know that tax discussions are the adult equivalent of 'do you want to play a game?' Spoiler: no one wants to play that game..