NOVEMBER 4, 1970

Full News Archive

• Headline: Democratic Gains in Gubernatorial Elections. Impact: The G.O.P.'s setback in major states sparked a chain reaction, leading to a future where flip-flopping political strategies became an Olympic sport. Eventually, political strategists needed a GPS to navigate their own party platforms.. Fact: Fun fact: The Democratic Party has since perfected the art of winning elections just by showing up and reminding everyone that the other guys are, well, the other guys..
• Headline: Reagan Secures Second Term in 1970 Election. Impact: Reagan's re-election was the spark that fueled a decades-long obsession with 'Hollywood' politics, leading to a reality TV star becoming president in the 21st century. Who knew acting skills could translate into governance?. Fact: Did you know that the only thing more inflated than Reagan's ego was the national debt during his presidency? Just a coincidence!.
• Headline: Buckley's Perspectives on Drug Issues. Impact: Buckley's insights on drugs may have inspired a future where politicians treat drug policy like a game of whack-a-mole. Spoiler: It didn't work out too well.. Fact: Fun fact: Buckley was more controversial than a cat video on the internet, and just as divisive!.
• Headline: G.O.P. Candidates Sweep To Victor in Connecticut. Impact: This GOP victory in Connecticut was the beginning of a trend where the party learned that if you can get all the right people to vote, you can pretty much ignore everyone else. Welcome to modern politics!. Fact: Did you know that the GOP candidates in Connecticut thought they were running for mayor of a small town instead of a U.S. Senate seat? Their campaign slogans were eerily similar..
• Headline: Fiancee of Suspect in Mail–Theft Ring Seized in Courthouse Surprise. Impact: The arrest of the fiancée linked to a mail-theft ring set off an entire generation of paranoid post-office-goers who began to believe that every letter they sent was a potential heist waiting to happen.. Fact: Fun fact: The only thing more surprising than the mail-theft ring's discovery was that they didn’t get caught with a million-dollar stamp collection..
• Headline: ALLENDE SWORN; URGES SACRIFICE. Impact: Allende's call for sacrifice paved the way for a rollercoaster of political upheaval in Chile, eventually inspiring a series of 'Socialism 101' workshops that nobody asked for.. Fact: Did you know that the only thing more challenging than building socialism is getting the public to agree on what socialism actually means?.
• Headline: Each Party Registers Gain of Seat in a House. Impact: The House seat gains led to a never-ending game of political musical chairs, where nobody ever wins, but everyone pretends they have a seat.. Fact: Fun fact: The only thing more stable than the House of Representatives is a toddler's attention span in a room full of shiny objects..
• Headline: Wallace Elected Governor In Alabama Landslide Vote. Impact: Wallace's landslide victory in Alabama was the beginning of a long tradition of using political campaigns to address racial issues—by pretending they don’t exist.. Fact: Did you know that Wallace's campaign slogan was essentially 'Make Alabama Great Again' long before it became a thing? Talk about foresight!.
• Headline: Nonresident Taxpayers Protest in Philadelphia. Impact: The protest against nonresident taxpayers was the start of a long and winding road where taxes became the ultimate villain in the American narrative—right next to kale.. Fact: Fun fact: The Nonresident Taxpayers Association might as well have been called 'People Who Don't Want to Pay Taxes but Still Want to Live Here.'.
• Headline: WILLIAMS WINNER IN RACE IN JERSEY. Impact: Williams' win in Jersey set off a chain of property tax exemption debates that made local governments experts in the fine art of dodging actual issues.. Fact: Did you know that increasing property tax exemptions for the elderly is basically the political equivalent of giving out free samples at a grocery store? It keeps them coming back for more!.