SEPTEMBER 30, 1969

Full News Archive

• Headline: NATO Expansion Proposal by Jane's Fighting Ships. Impact: This seemingly innocuous suggestion led to a series of awkward diplomatic dinners where countries awkwardly tried to one-up each other on who had the best military might. Spoiler: it was never about the salad.. Fact: Fun fact: Jane’s Fighting Ships is basically the Tinder for navies. Swipe left if they don't have enough submarines!.
• Headline: Swedish Film Hits 5 Million in Revenue. Impact: The unexpected success of this film inspired countless directors to think they could make a fortune off bizarre plots, leading to a decade of cinema where cats and time travel were taken way too seriously.. Fact: For every dollar a film makes, there's a director who thinks it deserves an Oscar—especially if it features a cat..
• Headline: Brooklyn Pact Ends Wildcat Telephone Strike. Impact: This strike led to the invention of texting. If workers hadn’t demanded better conditions, we might still be communicating through smoke signals or carrier pigeons.. Fact: Wildcat strikes are named not because of wild cats but because of wild tempers. Who knew labor disputes could be so feisty?.
• Headline: G.O.P. Asks War Foes to Wait; Democrats Debate New Attack; G.O.P. Asks War Foes to Wait; Democrats Debate New Attack. Impact: This endless cycle of political dithering led to the invention of the phrase 'kick the can down the road,' which is now used more often than actual road construction.. Fact: Debating politics is like watching paint dry, but at least paint has a chance of finishing before the debate does..
• Headline: Biafran Grenade Attack Starts a Confused Battle. Impact: This grenade attack marked the beginning of many more confusions, not just on the battlefield, but in how we define ‘confused’ in modern warfare. It’s like the ‘Who’s on first?’ routine, but with grenades.. Fact: The Biafran War is a stark reminder that sometimes, things get so messy that nobody really knows who’s fighting for what anymore..
• Headline: Connecticut Aide Named. Impact: The appointment of this aide sparked a bureaucratic chain reaction that resulted in the creation of more obscure government titles than you can shake a stick at. Seriously, who knew a Transportation Commissioner was a thing?. Fact: Connecticut: where government positions are invented faster than you can say 'taxpayer dollars at work.'.
• Headline: Rhodesians Are Eliminating the Last Symbols of Empire. Impact: By ditching the Union Jack, Rhodesia paved the way for future countries to find their own identity—sometimes through questionable flag choices, but hey, at least they tried!. Fact: The new national anthem was so catchy that it inadvertently led to international karaoke night, where everyone just pretended to know the words..
• Headline: ARMY DROPS BERETS' CASE AS C.I.A. BARS ITS AGENTS FROM TESTIFYING AT TRIAL; RESOR TAKES STEP He Says the Agency's Stand Has Ruled Out Fair Courts-Martial Army Drops Beret Case as C.I.A. Bars Testimony. Impact: This decision set a precedent for future cases, further confusing the line between military justice and a game of 'who can keep a secret the longest.'. Fact: In military circles, dropping cases is just as common as dropping the ball—except the stakes are a bit higher than a game of flag football..
• Headline: Prostitution Arrests Rise. Impact: The spike in arrests led to an increase in underground economies, proving once again that when you push something underground, it just tends to flourish in the dark.. Fact: In NYC, the only thing that rises faster than prostitution arrests is the price of a cab ride. Coincidence? I think not..
• Headline: LEASE IS BROKEN BY RIGHTS AGENCY; Action Coupled With Order to Landlord to Admit Negro. Impact: This landmark decision was a significant step towards civil rights, creating a ripple effect that would inspire future generations to challenge injustice and demand equality.. Fact: This case is a reminder that sometimes you have to break a few leases to make a point. Or was it 'break a few eggs'? Either way, progress is messy..