AUGUST 30, 1969

Full News Archive

• Headline: Hanoi Celebrates Economic Growth Despite War. Impact: The increased output in Hanoi meant that the locals were actually making more noise, leading to the invention of earplugs that would later become essential gear for tourists during the Vietnam War.. Fact: Did you know that the US bombing raids actually prompted a new genre of music in Vietnam? It was called 'Boom Boom Blues'—very popular, but hard to dance to..
• Headline: Arlington Night Racing Begins with Excitement. Impact: Night racing became such a hit that it eventually led to the invention of glow-in-the-dark horses, which are now a staple in every underground racetrack in the galaxy.. Fact: Did you know that Arlington Park's first night race featured more drama than a soap opera? There were scandalous horse affairs and a mysterious disappearance of a favorite jockey!.
• Headline: NAVY FIRM ON CUT AT BROOKLYN YARD; Says Economies Require It -- Lindsay Insists Jobs at Laboratory Be Saved NAVY FIRM ON CUT AT BROOKLYN YARD. Impact: The job cuts at the Brooklyn Yard led to an unexpected surge in the 'Just Got Laid Off' job fair industry—now a multi-billion dollar sector. Who knew despair could be so lucrative?. Fact: Did you know that job cuts in the Navy often lead to the creation of reality shows? 'Survivor: Brooklyn Yard' is still in the pitch stage, but it's got potential!.
• Headline: Ann Brownell Wed to Dr. R. B. Sloane. Impact: This wedding set off a chain reaction of terrible puns about 'tying the knot' that haunted wedding invitations for decades. Thanks, Ann and Dr. Sloane.. Fact: Did you know that Dr. Sloane's wedding present was a lifetime supply of 'Doctor's Orders'—the only prescription you can't fill?.
• Headline: A Stranger to Nixons Goes to Work for Them. Impact: This stranger's appointment to the White House led to a series of bizarre culinary experiments that ultimately resulted in the infamous 'White House Mystery Meat'.. Fact: Did you know that the White House has a strict policy on housekeepers? They must be great at dusting and even better at keeping secrets—especially the ones about the food..
• Headline: India Nationalization Loses. Impact: The rejection of nationalization in India led to a series of confusing economic policies that ultimately resulted in the rise of the 'Indian Curry Economy'—delicious, but extremely volatile.. Fact: Did you know that the Parliament's rejection of nationalization was fueled by an intense debate over who makes the best chai in the office? Spoiler: It's always the intern..
• Headline: ROGER HINDS, LAWYER FOR 60 YEARS, WAS 82. Impact: Roger Hinds' passing created a ripple of nostalgia, leading to the creation of the 'Eternal Lawyer' character in pop culture, always ready to argue your case even in the afterlife.. Fact: Did you know that Roger Hinds once defended a sandwich in court? It was a classic case of 'a matter of taste'—and yes, the sandwich won..
• Headline: Curb on Mine Union Paper Upheld by Appeals Court. Impact: The Appeals Court ruling against the mine union paper sparked a wave of underground newspapers, which are now read only by those who enjoy a good conspiracy theory.. Fact: Did you know that the mine union's paper was once considered the 'New York Times' of the underground? Now it's more of a 'Lost in the Shuffle' kind of read..