SEPTEMBER 5, 1966

Full News Archive

• Headline: Lynda Johnson's Lake Winnebago Cruise. Impact: This leisurely cruise set off a chain reaction of future political aides deciding that lakeside retreats were the best way to strategize—blame it for all those political vacations that seem to last forever.. Fact: Did you know that if you cruise long enough, you might just avoid making any actual decisions?.
• Headline: New Guidelines for Wage Management. Impact: The call for new labor guidelines sparked a global movement where workers began to demand things like lunch breaks and a living wage—what a radical concept!. Fact: Did you know that 'new guideposts' is just bureaucrat-speak for 'we have no idea what we're doing but we pretend to care'?.
• Headline: Farm Workers in Texas End Two-Month March. Impact: The end of this march inspired future generations of activists to adopt similar tactics, leading to the annual 'Walk a Mile in My Shoes' event—where no one actually walks a mile, but hey, it sounds good.. Fact: Did you know that marching for two months burns more calories than most gym memberships? Just saying..
• Headline: Quake in Bogota Area Kills 8 and Injures 40. Impact: This tragic event prompted a renewed focus on earthquake preparedness in Colombia, ultimately resulting in better building codes and community resilience, though it took multiple quakes for people to finally pay attention.. Fact: Natural disasters are the universe's way of reminding us that we need to stop ignoring the 'earthquake drill' emails..
• Headline: Balloon Remains Elusive. Impact: The failure of this balloon to deflate gave rise to the invention of 'hot air' political debates, where things just keep floating around without ever landing.. Fact: Did you know that every time a balloon drifts away, a party clown sheds a tear?.
• Headline: FRANCE E. HERRON. Impact: The mere existence of France E. Herron is a reminder that sometimes people just want to be left alone in history, much like that one relative who shows up at family gatherings uninvited.. Fact: Did you know that sometimes the most interesting historical figures are the ones who did absolutely nothing noteworthy?.
• Headline: Guards Bayonet Hecklers In Cicero's Rights March; Hecklers Bayoneted by Guardsmen at Rights March in Cicero. Impact: This violent clash underscored the ongoing struggle for civil rights, ultimately leading to stronger protections for demonstrators and the phrase 'not all heroes wear capes' being permanently etched into activist culture.. Fact: Did you know that sometimes, the only thing more dangerous than hecklers at a rights march is the lack of respect for personal space?.
• Headline: Tight Money and Rising Prices Pose a Problem for Democrats; Indicators Show Economy Is Healthy, but Politicians Agree That Inflation Can Become Republican Issue. Impact: This economic conundrum paved the way for decades of politicians playing hot potato with the economy, where everyone agrees that inflation is bad, but no one wants to be the one holding the bag.. Fact: Did you know that tight money is just a euphemism for 'we forgot how to budget'?.
• Headline: Severn Bridge Guarded Against Welsh Nationalists. Impact: The security measures taken at the bridge became a template for future overreactions to peaceful protests, leading to the invention of the phrase 'bring out the troops' at every minor inconvenience.. Fact: Did you know that sometimes, the most secure places are those that are guarded against things that don't actually pose a threat, like a toddler with a crayon?.