MARCH 19, 1966

Full News Archive

• Headline: City Bank's Stance on South Africa Branches. Impact: The bank's refusal to close branches might have inadvertently sparked the idea for future activists to start using social media. Imagine if they'd just closed those branches; we might have had a different Twitter today—one dedicated to the joys of banking instead of social justice.. Fact: The bank's decision was so groundbreaking that it inspired the phrase 'banking on the wrong horse'—which has absolutely nothing to do with banking, but it's catchy, right?.
• Headline: Saigon's Standoff with Buddhist Leaders. Impact: By refusing to yield to Buddhist pressure, the junta guaranteed several future protests, which probably inspired the next generation of activists to take a more 'peaceful' approach—like yoga classes instead of military coups.. Fact: The junta's stubbornness could have inspired a bestselling book titled 'How to Win Friends and Influence People: The Military Edition.'.
• Headline: Space Dogs Show No Ill Effects. Impact: The space dogs' successful mission may have led to the idea that if dogs can handle space travel, humans can handle anything—including the existential dread of Monday mornings.. Fact: The dogs were so unfazed that they returned with a newfound confidence, demanding front-row seats at every bone-related event in the galaxy..
• Headline: Man Convicted in L.I. Slaying. Impact: This conviction could be seen as a catalyst for future true crime documentaries, proving that every trial has the potential to become a binge-worthy series—just add some dramatic music and a few cliffhangers.. Fact: The trial was so sensational that it sparked the popular phrase 'True Crime: Not Just for Netflix Anymore!'.
• Headline: Modern Union Chief; Louis Stulberg. Impact: Louis Stulberg’s rise likely inspired future union leaders to adopt the motto 'If it ain't broke, don't fix it'—a strategy that has worked wonders in the world of labor negotiations. Just ask any overworked employee!. Fact: Stulberg's tenure was so significant that he was once referred to as 'the man who could negotiate with a toaster.'.
• Headline: Two Good Reasons Why Bendel Ignores Paris. Impact: Bendel's indifference to Paris may have inadvertently triggered an entire fashion movement that celebrates the art of ignoring trends—hence the birth of the 'I woke up like this' aesthetic.. Fact: Rumor has it that Henri Bendel was actually just trying to avoid a Parisian fashion faux pas by sticking to good old NYC styles—because nothing says 'fashion icon' like a New Yorker in sweatpants..
• Headline: BULGARIA LEAVING SOVIET'S SHADOW; She Is Called Increasingly Willing to Act on Her Own. Impact: Bulgaria's brave step away from the Soviet Union might have inspired countless other countries to follow suit, leading to the global trend of 'freedom'—which, as we know, is just another word for 'more options on Netflix.'. Fact: The gradual emergence was so impressive that it could have been a reality TV show: 'Keeping Up with the Eastern Bloc.'.
• Headline: PRESIDENT CONFERS WITH RIGHTS CHIEFS. Impact: President Johnson’s meeting with civil rights leaders likely laid the groundwork for future discussions, which could lead to a world where politicians actually listen to their constituents—imagine that!. Fact: This meeting was so long that the coffee was probably cold by the end, leading to the world's first 'Civil Rights Cold Brew' campaign..
• Headline: PFIZER IS ENTERING AEROSPACE BUSINESS. Impact: Pfizer's leap into aerospace might have inspired pharmaceutical companies everywhere to consider launching their products into space—after all, if you can’t cure it on Earth, why not try the moon?. Fact: Pfizer's motto after this acquisition became 'We put the 'space' in 'space-tional health!' Quite catchy, right?.