SEPTEMBER 22, 1965

Full News Archive

• Headline: U.S. Buildings Attacked in Pakistan Protests. Impact: This incident ignites a series of protests that ultimately lead to a new trend in political activism: 'Protest Picnics,' where people bring snacks to make their dissent more palatable.. Fact: Did you know that setting buildings on fire was once considered a valid form of communication? Apparently, the 'flame-gram' never caught on..
• Headline: Catholic Women's Equality Movement Gains Momentum. Impact: This pivotal moment in church history leads to a complete overhaul of church practices, paving the way for a future where women can finally preach about how to properly organize a book club.. Fact: Fun fact: The Catholic Church has a history of being slightly behind on women's rights. At this rate, they'll catch up just in time for the next millennium!.
• Headline: HUMPHREY TO ACT ON ATHLETIC FEUD; Senate Urges Arbitrators to Study A.A.U. and N.C.A.A.. Impact: This dispute leads to the invention of the 'Athlete's Arbitration App,' which becomes wildly popular, eventually resulting in a reality show where athletes duel over petty grievances. Spoiler alert: it never ends well.. Fact: Did you know that the Senate has time to discuss athletic disputes but still can't agree on universal healthcare? Makes you wonder what gets the priority, huh?.
• Headline: U.S. AIR LOSS SETS RECORD FOR DAY IN VIETNAM WAR; Seven Plane Are Destroyed -- Pilot Held by Reds Told of Mechanical Trouble Loss of Seven U.S. Planes in Day Sets Record in South Vietnam War. Impact: The loss of these planes sets off a chain reaction, leading to increased military technology investment. Ironically, this eventually leads to the creation of drones that have no 'emotional baggage' attached to them.. Fact: The Vietnam War was a catalyst for various changes in military strategy, one of which was the realization that 'more planes' doesn't always equal 'better outcomes.'.
• Headline: POPE INTERVENES ON LIBERTY TEXT; BACKS LIBERALS; He Is Said to Overrule Bid by Conservatives to Keep Draft From Vote TEST SUPPORTS PLAN Council Turns to Schema on Role of the Church in Modern World POPE INTERVENES ON LIBERTY TEXT. Impact: The Pope’s intervention sparks a movement that eventually leads to a modern church where debates happen over lattes instead of in solemn cathedrals. 'Coffee and Doctrine' becomes the new trend.. Fact: This moment is considered a turning point for the Church, proving that even papal decrees can sometimes be more about public relations than divine guidance..
• Headline: Flying Saucer? A Nonbeliever Took This Photo; FLYING SAUCER? PHOTO IS SHOWN. Impact: This UFO sighting triggers a series of conspiracy theories that lead to the creation of an entire subculture of 'UFO Spotters' who still argue over whether the real aliens prefer Earth or Mars.. Fact: Did you know that every time someone claims to see a UFO, somewhere a conspiracy theorist gets their wings? It's a win-win!.
• Headline: BAKER INQUIRY REVIVED BRIEFLY; Senator Questions Nominee for U.S. Attorney on His Work for Serv-U BAKER INQUIRY REVIVED BRIEFLY. Impact: This inquiry ignites a series of legal battles that ultimately leads to the popularization of the phrase 'Serv-U, but I won't,' becoming a standard response in awkward social situations.. Fact: Did you know that this inquiry was so riveting that it was almost turned into a courtroom drama? Spoiler: It was rejected for lacking any actual drama..