MAY 9, 1965

Full News Archive

• Headline: Canada Expels Soviet Diplomats for Espionage. Impact: The expulsion of these Soviet aides led to a heightened sense of paranoia in Canada, resulting in a decade-long obsession with buying Canadian bacon instead of importing from the USSR. Who knew breakfast could change history?. Fact: Did you know that Canada once kicked out two Soviet aides? It's like a really awkward breakup where one side just doesn't get the hint..
• Headline: The Rise of Quiz Shows in Poland. Impact: The success of the quiz show led to an explosion of trivia nights in bars across Poland, eventually causing a nationwide crisis of confidence as people realized they couldn’t name all the Polish kings. Who knew trivia could be so revealing?. Fact: For just 25,000 zlotys, you could get a hit on Polish TV. For the same amount today, I can only afford a decent cup of coffee..
• Headline: Dominican Junta Claims Nationwide Control. Impact: The political chaos in the Dominican Republic sent shockwaves through the Caribbean, leading to an increase in margarita consumption as citizens tried to drown their sorrows, which ironically led to a rise in the popularity of beach resorts. Cheers to bad governance!. Fact: When a junta claims to control everything, it’s usually a sign that they really control nothing. Welcome to the world of political theater!.
• Headline: PENTAGON FINDS DRAFT MUST STAY; URGES REVISIONS; Study Seeks Conscription at an Earlier Age and Wider Range of Deferments PENTAGON FINDS DRAFT MUST STAY. Impact: The Pentagon's insistence on keeping the draft alive led to a cultural shift where young Americans began to think of conscription as an awkward rite of passage, like getting braces or learning to parallel park. Welcome to adulthood!. Fact: The Pentagon found that the draft must stay, which is code for 'We really like having you on standby.' How comforting!.
• Headline: The Air Around Us; THE BREATH OF LIFE. By Donald E. Carr. 175 pp. New York: W.W. Norton & Co. $3.95. WITH EVERY BREATH YOU TAKE. By Howard R. Lewis. Illustrated. 322 pp. New York: Crown Publishers $5. The Air The Air. Impact: The publication of two books on pollution led to a momentary spike in environmental awareness, followed by decades of ignoring the problem until it became a full-blown crisis. So, thanks for that, authors!. Fact: Books on pollution: because nothing says 'I care about the environment' quite like reading about it while sipping from a single-use plastic bottle..
• Headline: Kidde Elects High Officer. Impact: Kidde's executive election led to a series of corporate mergers and acquisitions reminiscent of a reality show where everyone is trying to outmaneuver each other. Spoiler alert: They all end up in the same boardroom.. Fact: Kidde elects high officers! Because nothing says 'we mean business' quite like a fancy title and a corner office..
• Headline: BOLIVIAN ELECTION IN OCTOBER IS OFF. Impact: The cancellation of the Bolivian elections led to years of political instability, which ultimately became a plot point in several telenovelas, proving that real-life drama is always more captivating than fiction.. Fact: Bolivia’s elections being canceled is like planning a party and forgetting to send out the invites—awkward and kind of sad..
• Headline: Per Capita Income for Texas Is 33d Among Nation's States. Impact: Texas's ranking in per capita income led to a statewide competition to see who could flaunt their wealth with the most obnoxious cowboy hats. Because nothing screams 'I’m doing well' like a 10-gallon hat.. Fact: Texas ranks 33rd in per capita income! So, statistically, if you're broke, you’re just average in the Lone Star State..