FEBRUARY 15, 1965

Full News Archive

• Headline: Costly Christmas Gifts: Johnson's Controversial Phones. Impact: This $50 charge for modifying antique French phones led to a nationwide movement of giving terrible gifts, culminating in the invention of the 'gift receipt' a few decades later. Who knew that one overpriced phone could birth a billion awkward holiday exchanges?. Fact: Did you know that in France, they have a saying for gifts that require extra fees? 'Cadeau avec frais supplémentaires,' which roughly translates to 'I hope you like it, because it cost you more than just my love!'.
• Headline: Truce Observers Withdraw from North Vietnam. Impact: The request for truce observers to leave North Vietnam set in motion a series of events that caused future diplomats to drink heavily, leading to the invention of the 'Diplomat's Martini' – shaken, not stirred, because who needs to be sober in these negotiations?. Fact: Fun fact: The first truce observer was actually allergic to conflict. It turns out, he was just trying to find a quiet place to nap!.
• Headline: Moses Proposes Bridge from L.I. to Port Chester. Impact: Robert Moses' quest for a bridge birthed a thousand traffic jams and the phrase 'I love sitting in my car.' This led to the rise of podcasting, as bored commuters sought any distraction from the hellscape of urban traffic.. Fact: Did you know that Moses was known as 'The Master Builder'? And here we are thinking that title should belong to the person who can assemble IKEA furniture without crying..
• Headline: Retirement Fund Names Economist. Impact: The appointment of an economist to a retirement fund may have accidentally sparked the Great 'What Do You Mean I Can't Retire at 30?' Crisis of the late 20th century, causing millennials to rethink their life choices while scrolling through Instagram.. Fact: Fun fact: Coll Retirement Equities Fund is not to be confused with the Collateral Damage Fund, which is what you’ll need after retirement if you didn’t plan properly!.
• Headline: CONFESSION CASES MAY RISE SHARPLY; ' Flood' of Applicants Cite Issue of Coercion. Impact: The rise in confession case applications led to the introduction of the phrase 'I need a lawyer' into everyday conversation, forever altering the way people communicated their regrets.. Fact: Did you know that the most common confession in history is 'I ate the last slice of pizza'? This has sparked countless debates about ethics and friendship..
• Headline: SELMA NEGROES SET VOTE MARCH TODAY. Impact: The Selma voter registration march was a critical step in civil rights that eventually led to the creation of the phrase 'Every vote counts,' a sentiment that has been both comforting and painfully ironic ever since.. Fact: Did you know that Dr. King led the march despite being exhausted? It just goes to show that even heroes need to power through their 'I need a nap' moments..
• Headline: Vietnam Policy Statement Is Expected in Washington; CAPITAL AWAITING OUTLINE OF POLICY. Impact: The expected Vietnam policy statement caused a flurry of speculation that turned into a game of telephone, resulting in the U.S. accidentally announcing a plan for a free taco truck on every corner instead.. Fact: Fun fact: The phrase 'Vietnam policy' became so common that it was later used in bingo games to liven up dull political gatherings..