JANUARY 31, 1965

Full News Archive

• Headline: Foreign Cars See Significant U.S. Sales Increase. Impact: The rise of foreign car sales sparked a revolution in American auto manufacturing. Little did they know, this would lead to the rise of '70s muscle cars and a decade of questionable fashion choices regarding bell-bottoms and platform shoes.. Fact: Did you know that the first foreign car sold in the U.S. was a Fiat? It was like the awkward cousin showing up at a family reunion—no one knew how to react..
• Headline: US Sec Freeman Visits Berlin Wall. Impact: Freeman's tour of the Berlin Wall was like the world's most depressing tourist trap. This would eventually lead to a series of wall-related puns that would haunt future comedians.. Fact: Did you know the Berlin Wall was 96 miles long? That's one long wall for all the 'Keep Out' signs!.
• Headline: NEW LAW SOUGHT ON PENSION PLANS; Presidential Panel Proposes Revising Fund Standards. Impact: The push for pension plan reforms foreshadowed the endless battle between employers and employees over retirement funds. This would eventually lead to the popular phrase 'Why is my 401(k) so sad?'. Fact: Did you know that the average American worker changes jobs 10 times before age 40? So good luck collecting on that pension, folks!.
• Headline: East German Fair Sees Big West Participation. Impact: The East German fair's big Western participation was like a high school dance where the popular kids finally decided to show up. This would stir up tensions that would inevitably lead to the most awkward moments in Cold War history.. Fact: Did you know that the Berlin Wall was built to keep people in, not out? Talk about a commitment to awkward family reunions!.
• Headline: WHO'S WHO IN THE CONGO STRUGGLE. Impact: The Congo struggle headlines would eventually become a hot topic for political science classes, serving as a cautionary tale on how not to handle a country’s independence—like giving a toddler a chainsaw.. Fact: Did you know that the Congo is home to the world's second-largest rainforest? So, you know, juxtaposing chaos with natural beauty since forever..
• Headline: VATICAN'S COUNCIL MAY DISCUSS REDS; Pope Hints at Topic in Talk to Anti-Communist Units. Impact: The Vatican's discussions about Communism hinted at the church trying to keep up with modern issues—like that one uncle who still thinks disco is going to make a comeback.. Fact: Did you know Pope John XXIII's encyclical 'Pacem in Terris' was one of the first to address human rights? Which is ironic, considering the church's ongoing struggle with that whole child protection thing..
• Headline: Campbell Soup Forms Unit. Impact: Campbell Soup forming a new division was the catalyst for a culinary revolution, eventually leading to the invention of the microwave and the universally loved concept of 'dinner in a can.'. Fact: Did you know that Campbell's Tomato Soup was Andy Warhol's favorite? He practically made soup cool before it was trendy to be 'artisan.'.
• Headline: U.N. Sends Group to Study Israel-Jordan Incidents. Impact: The U.N. sending a group to study Israeli-Jordanian incidents was like sending a high school debate team to mediate a family feud. This would only escalate tensions and spark a series of discussions that went nowhere, yet somehow made everyone feel important.. Fact: Did you know that the U.N. has its own flag? It’s blue and white, which is ironic considering how often they end up being painted into a corner..