SEPTEMBER 11, 1964

Full News Archive

• Headline: 1965 Buick Riviera Design Innovations. Impact: The decision to hide headlights led to a generation of car designers believing that aesthetics were more important than visibility, contributing to the rise of the 'fashion over function' mentality in automotive design. This eventually resulted in the creation of cars that look great but are impossible to see out of.. Fact: Buick's decision to hide headlights was revolutionary! Too bad it didn't revolutionize their sales, which were still hiding just out of sight..
• Headline: Minuteman Missile Test at Vandenberg. Impact: The successful test of the Minuteman missile would later spark a global arms race, with countries frantically trying to outdo each other on who could create the most elaborate backyard missile launchers. This would eventually lead to a very awkward family BBQ in the 1980s.. Fact: The Minuteman missile was named after the American revolutionary militia that could be ready in a minute, proving that some things really do escalate quickly..
• Headline: Stevenson Critiques Goldwater's Ideology. Impact: Stevenson’s public denouncement of Goldwater's views helped to solidify party lines. Little did they know this would set the stage for a long-term division that would make Thanksgiving dinners awkward for decades.. Fact: Stevenson’s criticisms were so intense that they could have been a subplot in a soap opera. If only they had a dramatic theme song!.
• Headline: Souvanna Flying to London. Impact: Souvanna Phouma's diplomatic mission laid the groundwork for future international relations in Southeast Asia, which would eventually lead to many 'let's not repeat history' discussions in political science classes worldwide.. Fact: Flying to London for talks sounds fancy, but I bet Souvanna wished he had just sent an email instead..
• Headline: New President Named By Wells Fargo & Co.. Impact: J. A. Henderson’s appointment as president meant that the company’s financial strategies would ripple through banking practices for decades, leading to the creation of the term 'too big to fail'. Ah, the irony!. Fact: Wells Fargo has had more presidents than some countries! At least their elections are easier to follow..
• Headline: Times Promotes Harrison Salisbury. Impact: Harrison Salisbury's promotion would usher in a new era of investigative journalism, inadvertently leading to a future where everyone thinks they can be a journalist just by tweeting their opinions.. Fact: Salisbury was so influential that if he were around today, he would probably have a Twitter following larger than most Kardashians!.
• Headline: MILLER DEPLORES JOHNSON'S TV LINK; Says President Should Drop Family Holdings in Austin. Impact: Miller's public criticism of Johnson’s ties to Austin sparked a wave of political transparency discussions, ultimately leading to the modern-day obsession with politicians' side hustles. Because nothing says 'trust me' like a YouTube channel.. Fact: It's always a great strategy to tell the sitting president what he should and shouldn't do. Just ask Miller how that worked out for him!.
• Headline: QUEENS COLLAGE GETS PRESIDENT; McMurray, U.S. Economist, Named to Succeed Stoke. Impact: McMurray’s appointment at Queens College would inspire a generation of economists who would later argue passionately about whether or not they should be called economists at all. Spoiler: they never settled it.. Fact: Who knew that the fate of economic theories could hinge on the appointment of a college president? Next thing you know, they’ll be appointing a president based on who has the best memes!.
• Headline: Books of The Times; An Awesome Gift for Banality. Impact: The review of Condon’s book, which was labeled as banal, led to an underground movement of literary rebels who vowed to write only the most thrillingly dull books imaginable, thus creating an entire genre of 'meh'.. Fact: When a book is described as an 'awesome gift for banality', you know it’s destined for the clearance rack of your local bookstore..
• Headline: DEMOCRATS UPSET BY GEORIA VOTE; Anti‐Johnson Feeling Seen in Primary Returns. Impact: The electoral upset highlighted the growing rift within the Democratic Party, triggering a carnival of political theater that would lead to a generation of analysts who make careers out of dissecting why nobody can agree on anything.. Fact: If only the Democrats had seen this coming, they could have saved themselves a lot of trouble and just stocked up on popcorn for the show!.