MARCH 14, 1964

Full News Archive

• Headline: Cogen Criticizes Court's Parole Decisions. Impact: If only the court had kept those attackers behind bars, perhaps the next generation would have had a better understanding of consequences. Instead, they just learned that crime pays—at least until the next headline. Fact: Judges have been known to make questionable decisions, but we’ll stick with the classics like ‘I didn’t see that coming!’.
• Headline: B.O.A.C. Pilot Out Over Error. Impact: This dismissal might have sent the pilot on a journey to a new career in aviation mishaps, ultimately leading to the creation of a 'How Not to Fly' guide that becomes a bestseller. Fact: BOAC stands for British Overseas Airways Corporation, but after this incident, many suggested it really should stand for 'Banish Outrageous Airmen Completely'.
• Headline: WISCONSIN TO EXPAND DRAFT KENNEDY CLUB. Impact: Expanding the Draft Kennedy Club could have led to a nationwide obsession with political dynasties, ultimately resulting in every family adopting a 'Kennedy' as their last name to get ahead. Fact: In case you were wondering, the Kennedy family tree is more like a Kennedy family forest—thick, tangled, and still growing!.
• Headline: Article 3 -- No Title. Impact: Indonesia's resignation may have sparked a series of countries thinking they could just back out of commitments, leading to an era of global 'ghosting' in international relations. Fact: Indonesia's decision to step back was probably just a dramatic way of saying, 'It's not you, it's me.'.
• Headline: X‐15 is Tested 102d Time. Impact: The more the X-15 was tested, the closer we got to realizing that even the sky isn't the limit—until it is. Now we have a whole generation waiting for their turn to be 'space pioneers'. Fact: The X-15 was so fast that it had to carry its own emergency room—because, you know, just in case you decided to take a detour through the stratosphere.
• Headline: TOWNSEND IS PAID $400,000 FOR YEAR. Impact: Townsend's hefty paycheck may have inspired a new wave of corporate greed, leading to a generation of executives who think six-figure salaries are just a warm-up. Fact: If you think $400,000 is a lot, wait until you hear about the bonuses—it's like a jackpot for doing absolutely nothing.
• Headline: Books of The Times; End Papers. Impact: The release of 'Mountain Doctor' likely influenced a slew of medical dramas, forever changing how we view doctors—more handsome, less factual. Fact: Books like these are why so many people think they can take on a medical career after binge-watching just one season of Grey's Anatomy.