NOVEMBER 4, 1960

Full News Archive

• Headline: Campaign Issues -- IX; Effects of Candidates' Philosophies of The Presidency and Politics Weighed. Impact: This philosophical debate led to a series of 'Presidential Philosophy' workshops that inadvertently taught politicians how to overcomplicate simple issues, paving the way for the modern political circus we know and love today. Fact: Reston’s analysis was so influential that some politicians started carrying around philosophy books just to look smart at parties.
• Headline: VOTE TIME CLARIFIED; Government Employes to Get One to Three Hours Off. Impact: This decision to give federal employees time off for voting unwittingly led to the rise of 'strategic napping' as a political strategy, where voters would sleep through elections to avoid the headache of choosing a candidate. Fact: Many people still believe voting should be done in pajamas. They might be onto something.
• Headline: U.S. ASKED TO GIVE SPACE TASK TO U.N.. Impact: The proposal to hand over space tasks to the UN was the first domino in a long chain of events that eventually resulted in intergalactic diplomacy and a cosmic reality show where alien diplomats critique Earth’s foreign policy. Fact: If the UN had actually taken over space, we could have avoided countless awkward alien encounters that have since plagued sci-fi movies.
• Headline: 30 CHINESE AIDES REPORTED IN CUBA. Impact: The revelation of Chinese technicians in Cuba stirred up Cold War tensions, leading to an accidental international game of hide-and-seek that lasted for decades and resulted in countless spy novels. Fact: The phrase 'keep your friends close and your enemies closer' was actually a poorly translated proverb from a spy novel written during this time.
• Headline: Project to Be Built by Present Owners; $38 Million Center Is Due by 1964 HUGE PLANT IS DUE TO OPERATE BY '64 Garden's 3-Block Project Will Include Main Arena Seating 25,000 Fans. Impact: The construction of the new sports center was so grand that it inadvertently inspired a whole generation of architects to believe that bigger is always better, leading to the rise of the ‘Mega-Mall’ phenomenon we know today. Fact: Madison Square Garden has hosted more events than anyone can count, including a 'World's Largest Pizza Party' that didn't go as planned.
• Headline: PHARMACIST HERE FINED; Also Gets Suspended Term for Selling Without Prescription. Impact: The pharmacist's suspension for selling drugs without a prescription led to a nationwide crackdown on rogue pharmacists, resulting in a secret underground network of 'black market' prescription drugs that included everything from aspirin to gummy vitamins. Fact: J Sachs’ case became so infamous that it inspired a hit TV show called 'Breaking Prescriptions.'.
• Headline: HYDROGEN FUSION CONTAINED AGAIN IN TEST ON COAST; Control of Reaction Widened to Thousandth of a Second in Trial of Power Source Hydrogen Fusion Is Controlled Again in Tests on West Coast. Impact: The success of hydrogen fusion tests heralded a new era of energy research, eventually leading to the invention of a futuristic energy drink that promised to harness the power of the sun but mostly just made people jittery. Fact: Hydrogen fusion is often considered the holy grail of energy, mostly because no one has managed to use it without causing a minor disaster.