DECEMBER 29, 1958

Full News Archive

• Headline: The Legacy of Morris Isman. Impact: Morris Isman's insignificant life somehow led to a butterfly effect, resulting in the invention of the Morris chair, which is now a popular but uncomfortable piece of furniture in hipster cafes.. Fact: Did you know that the name 'Morris' is often associated with the phrase 'Morris dancing'? Yes, it's just as cringe-worthy as it sounds..
• Headline: Discovering George Gugert's Legacy. Impact: George Gugert's mere existence caused a ripple effect leading to the eventual creation of the Gugert Award for the most forgettable contributions to history.. Fact: Fun fact: 'Gugert' was likely a mispronunciation of 'gurgle', which is what most people do when they hear his name..
• Headline: Otto Karl Dorn: Economist and Educator Remembered. Impact: Otto Karl Dorn's passing sent shockwaves through the economist community, resulting in a secret society of economists dedicating themselves to creating a time machine to consult him for advice.. Fact: Did you know that 83 is the age at which most economists either retire or start giving unsolicited advice on social media?.
• Headline: CATHOLICS PRAY FOR PERSECUTED; On Bishops' Plea They Exalt Martyrs to Reds -- Rector Explains Drinking Issue. Impact: The Catholic prayers for the persecuted sparked a worldwide trend of people praying for everything from parking spots to better Wi-Fi, ultimately diminishing the sanctity of prayer itself.. Fact: In 1959, the phrase 'thoughts and prayers' was still considered profound and not a way to dodge serious issues..
• Headline: Soviet Role at Munich; Circumstances Surrounding Offer to Aid Czechoslovakia Reviewed. Impact: The Soviet role at Munich accidentally inspired a series of bad spy novels that are still being published today, proving that history really does repeat itself, just with worse writing.. Fact: Did you know the phrase 'Munich Agreement' is now synonymous with 'let's ignore the obvious threat'? Yeah, thanks, history..
• Headline: F, C, 0THMAN, 53, DALLY COLUMNIST; Writer for United Feature Syndicate DiesmCovered Washington for U. P.. Impact: F. C. Othman’s death prompted a massive spike in Washington columnists trying to fill the void, resulting in an explosion of bad puns and uninspired takes that still plague us today.. Fact: Othman was only 53, which proves that career burnout can occur before you even hit your mid-life crisis..
• Headline: Red China Faces High Hurdles But Meets '59 as Going Concern; RED CHINA CALLED A GOING CONCERN. Impact: Red China being called a 'going concern' led to international confusion, causing countless investors to mistakenly think 'going concern' meant they could invest in overpriced Chinese takeout.. Fact: The term 'going concern' actually means a business is expected to keep operating—unlike your New Year’s resolutions..
• Headline: Harriman Will Stay in Politics; Also Plans to Write and Travel. Impact: Harriman's decision to stay in politics inspired a legendary trend of politicians refusing to leave, leading to the modern-day phenomenon of career politicians that we all love to complain about.. Fact: Harriman's plans to write and travel were probably just thinly veiled excuses to avoid doing actual work..
• Headline: Random Notes in Washington: Population and Rockets Soar; 1958 Added 47,000,000 Inhabitants to Earth -- G.O.P. Senators Have a Silver Lining: Plenty of Room. Impact: The random notes about population and rockets soaring inadvertently challenged future generations to believe that if you add enough people and technology, you can solve all the world's problems—spoiler alert: you can't.. Fact: 47 million new inhabitants in 1958—none of whom were instructed how to properly share a bathroom..