OCTOBER 9, 1958

Full News Archive

• Headline: Sullivan Son Enlists in US Navy. Impact: J.T. Sullivan's enlistment would inspire a generations-long trend of young people joining the military, ultimately leading to a nationwide obsession with 'joining the Navy' that results in a significant increase in nautical-themed tattoos across America. Fact: Did you know that the Navy's recruitment slogan 'Join the Navy, See the World' actually originated from a misunderstanding of a travel brochure?.
• Headline: Yugoslavia's Denial of Revolt Involvement. Impact: Belgrade's denial of involvement in the Budapest revolt would lead to a series of diplomatic events where countries would start denying things left and right, eventually leading to the invention of the phrase 'I did not have diplomatic relations with that country.'. Fact: Fun fact: The only thing more complicated than Balkan politics is trying to pronounce 'Yugoslavia' correctly after several drinks.
• Headline: Eisenhower Appoints New Special Counsel. Impact: Eisenhower's staff completion marked the moment when every future president felt the overwhelming pressure to surround themselves with clever titles and ambiguous roles, leading to the creation of the 'Chief Coffee Officer' position in many offices. Fact: Did you know the position of 'special counsel' was created so that someone could have a title that sounds important but is still utterly useless?.
• Headline: 3 Countries Named To Security Council; U. N. FILLS 3 SEATS IN SECURITY BODY. Impact: The election of Italy, Tunisia, and Argentina to the Security Council would set a precedent for countries to campaign for popularity in global politics, leading to the first-ever televised 'Miss Security Council' pageant in the 1980s. Fact: Did you know that the Security Council is the only place where countries argue over international issues while pretending they aren't just there for the snacks?.
• Headline: SOVIET PRESSES ATOM BAN IN U. N.; Asks Priority for Its Move to End Nuclear Testing -- U. S. Opposes Bid. Impact: The Soviet push for an atom ban was the spark that ignited the Cold War 'nuclear arms race' party game, where countries tried to outdo each other in building bigger and flashier bombs, ultimately resulting in some very awkward international dinners. Fact: Did you know that the U.N. meetings around nuclear testing were basically just high-stakes poker games where no one wanted to show their cards?.
• Headline: SUMATRAN PORT SEIZED; But Indonesians Recapture Sibolga From Rebels. Impact: The recapture of Sibolga would inspire a host of action movies where the underdog army takes back their town, leading to the 'reclaim what’s yours' genre that would dominate cinema for decades. Fact: Did you know that the phrase 'the rebels are coming!' is actually a popular tagline in Indonesian tourism ads?.
• Headline: PIUS OFFERED WORLD 5-POINT PEACE PLAN. Impact: Pope Pius's peace plan would lead to the establishment of a secret league of world leaders who would meet annually to discuss how to avoid actual conflict while still managing to bicker over who gets the last piece of cake. Fact: Did you know that every peace plan proposed by popes has a hidden clause that requires all participants to agree on dessert first?.
• Headline: Storm Ends NATO Game. Impact: The storm that ended the NATO game would lead to a modern myth that NATO exercises are cursed, leading to elaborate rituals performed by naval officers to appease the weather gods before any drills. Fact: Did you know that 'NATO Game' is the military's way of saying, 'We’re not just playing Battleship, we’re serious!'?.
• Headline: NIXON BIDS G.O.P. RECALL '48 VOTE; In Philadelphia Speech, He Asserts Party Should Wage Fight as Truman Did. Impact: Nixon's call to recall the '48 vote would set a precedent where politicians would regularly reminisce about the good old days, leading to the rise of political nostalgia tours that could rival any pop star's comeback. Fact: Did you know that Nixon's speeches were so riveting that they once caused a group of historians to take a collective nap during his 'let's relive the past' tour?.