OCTOBER 2, 1957

Full News Archive

• Headline: Housing Bias Bill Controversy in 1957. Impact: If only Isaacs had known that this anti-bias bill would eventually lead to a nationwide debate on housing discrimination that would last for decades, maybe he would have used a more persuasive tone. Or not; it’s politics.. Fact: Housing bias? What a quaint idea. Who needs equality when you can just have a 'deliberate stall' tactic? Classic!.
• Headline: Algerian Rebels Demand New Peace Talks. Impact: In an alternate timeline, if the Algerian rebels had gotten their way sooner, we might have seen a world where French baguettes were exclusively served with couscous instead of butter. A culinary catastrophe averted!. Fact: Parley is French for 'talk.' So basically, these rebels were just asking for a really long coffee break with pastries. Sounds delightful!.
• Headline: Historic T.V.A. Steam Generator Approval. Impact: This steam generator? The biggest in the U.S.? It birthed an entire generation of engineers who believed bigger is always better—leading to the invention of the world's largest coffee mug. You can guess how that turned out.. Fact: The T.V.A. has been a powerhouse of innovation since day one. Too bad you can't power your Netflix binge-watching with a steam generator!.
• Headline: PARLEY ON BIAS ASKED; N.A.A.C.P. Bids Stratton Meet on School Segregation. Impact: Stratton meeting with the NAACP could have kickstarted a revolution in education reform. Instead, they just had a really awkward gathering where everyone brought potato salad.. Fact: School segregation—because who doesn’t want their education served with a side of discrimination? Deliciously outdated..
• Headline: 3 ALGERIANS EXPELLED; Guatemala Ousts Abbas and 2 Aides as Red Agitators. Impact: The expulsion of these Algerians led to a chain of events causing Guatemala to rethink its entire approach to politics. Spoiler alert: it involved a lot of coffee and confusion.. Fact: Red agitators? More like red tape in this case. One man's rebel is another man's tourist..
• Headline: 100 WHITES MAUL 6 NEGRO STUDENTS; West Virginia Troopers End Matoaka Attack--Unrest Laid to Little Rock Crisis. Impact: The attack on those students? It fueled civil rights movements across the U.S., proving that when you try to suppress equality, it tends to blow up in your face like a poorly made balloon animal.. Fact: Over a hundred people attacking six students? Sounds like a really bad math problem from an alternate universe where all students are also ninjas..
• Headline: Brazil to Shift Capital. Impact: Shifting the capital to Brasilia? It’s like deciding to move your party from the living room to the bathroom—way more space, but also questionable life choices.. Fact: Brasilia became the capital mainly to keep people from getting sunburned on Copacabana. Urban planning at its finest!.
• Headline: ANKARA EMBASSY CUTS LIRA'S RATE; 50% Slash for U.S. Staff Held Indication Turkey Plans Devaluation Statement Released A Different View. Impact: This lira exchange rate cut? It sent shockwaves through the economy, causing future generations of tourists to ask for better exchange rates while sipping Turkish coffee. Good luck with that!. Fact: Cutting exchange rates is just a fancy way of saying 'We don’t want your money.' How polite of them!.
• Headline: Books of The Times; A Prisoner in Russia Hero or Traitor. Impact: The controversy over whether Josip Broz-Tito was a hero or a traitor? It created a timeless debate that still rages on, mostly in coffee shops and among bored history majors.. Fact: Tito: the only man who could make both sides of a political debate simultaneously roll their eyes and raise their eyebrows..
• Headline: 130TH YEAR MARKED BY BRAZILIAN PAPER. Impact: The anniversary of a newspaper? This could have led to a resurgence of print media, but instead, it just meant more recycling bins filled with old news.. Fact: 130 years of journalism! That's a lot of ink spilled over topics that become irrelevant the moment they hit the press..