AUGUST 28, 1955

Full News Archive

• Headline: Zachs and McKee at Yale. Impact: If only they'd known that attending Yale would lead to a generation of people who think they can solve all the world's problems with a latte in hand and a degree in sociology.. Fact: Fun fact: Most Yale graduates go on to be very successful at networking... and reminding everyone they went to Yale..
• Headline: Heads Fund Campaign for Reform Judaism. Impact: This campaign marks the beginning of a long tradition of fundraisers in synagogues that eventually leads to the invention of the brisket sandwich—an unexpected culinary delight.. Fact: Did you know that fundraising is just a fancy way of saying, 'Please give us your money so we can do good things'?.
• Headline: N.Y.U. Expands Evening Course Offerings. Impact: The introduction of evening courses ultimately resulted in the global phenomenon of students pulling all-nighters fueled by caffeine and existential dread—thanks, NYU!. Fact: Did you know that evening courses are basically a way to keep students awake long enough to realize they still have to pay off their student loans?.
• Headline: FREED U.S. OFFICER DENIES RED TALK; Bumpus Says Anti-American Statements Laid to Him By North Korea Are Untrue. Impact: Bumpus's denial of anti-American sentiments is a pivotal moment leading to decades of diplomatic misunderstandings, awkward dinners, and the creation of the phrase 'I was misquoted' in political speak.. Fact: Fun fact: North Korea's idea of a good time is still debating whether to misquote someone on a Tuesday..
• Headline: India to Have Decimal Coins. Impact: The decimal rupee was so revolutionary that it inspired a global movement towards simplifying currency—though it took a while for people to stop using coins as makeshift weapons in bar fights.. Fact: Did you know that before decimal coins, most people just used whatever they could find? Like, who knew a cow could be worth five goats?.
• Headline: MORE IMMIGRANTS NEEDED BY CANADA; Government Seeks to Bring In More Skilled Laborers To Develop Vast Areas. Impact: Canada's quest for skilled laborers inadvertently led to the world's most polite immigration process, where even the paperwork says 'please' and 'thank you'—no one can escape the charm.. Fact: Fun fact: Canada's immigration forms come with a complimentary apology for any inconvenience caused..
• Headline: PILOT TELLS OF ESCAPE; Briton Lands Secret Plane Gasping, Canopy Lost. Impact: The pilot's daring escape inspired countless action movies, leading to the widespread belief that all pilots are secretly superheroes—and that flying without a canopy is just standard procedure.. Fact: Did you know that aviation safety manuals now include a section on 'how to look cool while losing your canopy'?.
• Headline: PARMELEE NO MORE; The Famous Old Chicago Inter-Station Transfer Service Is Bowing Out. Impact: The demise of the Parmelee service led to the rise of Uber, which now allows you to skip the train and ride in style—if your style includes questionable backseat karaoke.. Fact: Did you know that the only thing more confusing than the Parmelee service was figuring out how to actually pronounce its name?.
• Headline: A Lawyer's Review; THE OPPENHEIMER CASE: The Trial of a Security System. By Charles P. Curtis. 281 pp. New York: Simon & Schuster. $4.. Impact: Curtis's book on the Oppenheimer case influenced future generations of lawyers to write lengthy tomes that no one reads, yet somehow everyone quotes in arguments.. Fact: Fun fact: Legal books are the only genre where the more pages you write, the less likely anyone will actually read it..