FEBRUARY 1, 1955

Full News Archive

• Headline: Mormon Leaders Call for Military Action. Impact: If McKay's suggestion to invade China had been taken seriously, we might have seen a world where the Great Wall is now a popular tourist destination for American soldiers. Or maybe just a really awkward family reunion in Beijing.. Fact: Mormons have long been known for their focus on community and family, but apparently, that doesn't extend to international relations..
• Headline: Witness Admits to Fabricated Testimony. Impact: Had this confession gone unnoticed, Roy M. Cohn's career might have skyrocketed, leading him to become the namesake of a popular line of conspiracy theories, instead of just a footnote in history.. Fact: Lying under oath has a long tradition in politics, much like the 'oops, my bad' apology..
• Headline: Eisenhower's Apology for Lengthy Address. Impact: Eisenhower's apology opened the floodgates for future politicians to avoid accountability. Imagine a world where 'sorry' becomes the go-to answer for every political blunder.. Fact: Eisenhower was known for his calm demeanor, but it turns out even he could feel the heat of a high school debate..
• Headline: SOVIET 'ALARMED' BY FORMOSA PERIL; SOVIET 'ALARMED' BY FORMOSA PERIL Molotov Voices His Concern to British Envoy--Places Blame on U. S. Policy. Impact: Molotov's alarm likely sparked a series of awkward diplomatic dinners, where everyone pretended not to notice the elephant in the room—US foreign policy.. Fact: The USSR and the US had a complicated relationship, much like a couple that can't decide if they should break up or just go through a rough patch..
• Headline: BIAS ISSUE RAISED ON U.S. SCHOOL AID; Senate Hearings on Bills to Spur Building Wind Up in Segregation Wrangle. Impact: This Senate wrangling over school aid set a precedent for future politicians to argue about absolutely everything, paving the way for debate on whether ice cream should be classified as a vegetable.. Fact: Segregation debates in the Senate sound just as thrilling as watching paint dry—except with more yelling..
• Headline: 2,000 DEALERS BID AT WANAMAKER SALE. Impact: The Wanamaker sale became a rite of passage for aspiring dealers, eventually leading to the rise of reality TV shows like 'Storage Wars'—just with less drama and more bad fashion.. Fact: Who knew that bidding on random items could lead to a full-blown reality show? Next up, 'Bargain Hunters: The Musical'..
• Headline: Planetarium Completes Last 3 of Mural Illusions of Other Worlds. Impact: Completing those murals might have led to a new generation of artists thinking they could create otherworldly magic, only to realize they were just really good at finger painting.. Fact: Black light murals? Because regular art just wasn't trippy enough for the 1950s..
• Headline: Schools in St. Louis Start Desegregation; INTEGRATION GAIN MADE IN ST. LOUIS. Impact: St. Louis's desegregation effort might have been the spark that ignited a nationwide conversation on equality, or at least a few awkward family dinners discussing who gets the last piece of pie.. Fact: The first step towards desegregation is always the hardest—especially when everyone just wants to keep things as they are..
• Headline: HOOKER ELECTROCHEMICAL; Company Earned $1.20 in 1954 Against 95c a Share in 1953. Impact: Hooker Electrochemical's financial rise could have led to a future where people mistakenly associated chemical companies with a sense of moral superiority—because profits can cover a multitude of sins.. Fact: Funny how profits can make you feel like a genius, regardless of your actual business model..
• Headline: British Princess Off To Visit West Indies; PRINCESS BEGINS WEST INDIES TRIP. Impact: The Princess's trip might have inadvertently popularized Caribbean tourism for royals, leading to a future where royals are more known for their tan lines than their crowns.. Fact: Nothing says 'royalty' quite like a sunburn and a piña colada on the beach..