DECEMBER 18, 1954

Full News Archive

• Headline: Park Patrolman Ousted Amid Ticket Scandal. Impact: The ousting of a park patrolman set off a series of events that led to a nationwide panic about ticket-fixing, prompting the rise of 'honor system' parks where no one gets a ticket—because no one is checking!. Fact: Fun fact: The only thing worse than getting a parking ticket is realizing your park ranger is in cahoots with the ticket mafia.
• Headline: MRS. MARCO DIVIOVANNI. Impact: Mrs. Marco Diviovanni's mention in the headlines would later inspire a reality TV show about the lives of extraordinary housewives, proving that even the mundane can become a media sensation. Fact: Did you know that Mrs. Diviovanni probably had more drama in her life than most reality stars today? No cameras, just tea and gossip.
• Headline: ' Nativity Scene' Sheep Roam in Washington. Impact: The sheep's escape sparked the idea for a new trend in urban farming, leading to a future where hipsters raised sheep in city apartments, attempting to recreate the Nativity scene every Christmas. Fact: Did you know that if you'd asked the sheep, they probably would have preferred a career in free-range grazing to being part of a festive display?.
• Headline: MILLER PLAY HAILED IN FRENCH VERSION. Impact: The French version of the play was so popular that it created a theatrical movement where every American playwright had to prove their work was better translated into French—because, you know, French culture is just that superior. Fact: Fun fact: If you can make a play resonate in French, you might just get a free croissant for life. Or at least a fancy diploma.
• Headline: MANHOLE LIDS FLY IN. BLAST IN BRONX; 30-Block Area Is Rocked, Windows Broken, 7 Hurt by Sewer Explosion Sewer Blast Scatters 50 Manhole Covers in Bronx Sewer Blast Rips Area in Bronx, Sends 50 Manhole Covers Flying. Impact: The Bronx sewer explosion caused a series of safety inspections that ultimately led to a nationwide initiative to ensure manhole covers were properly secured, thus saving countless unsuspecting pedestrians from flying lids. Fact: Did you know that manhole cover flying contests have yet to become a sanctioned sport? I guess the 'manhole lid toss' just doesn't have the same ring to it.
• Headline: MAYS AND BERRA HEAD ALL-STARS; Giant Ace Gets 397 of 422 Votes in Associated Press Poll -- Yogi Tallies 389. Impact: Mays and Berra's all-star status led to a decades-long debate about who truly is the GOAT (Greatest of All Time), inspiring countless arguments in bars and sports talk shows across the nation. Fact: Fun fact: The debate over who’s the real all-star continues to this day, proving that sports fans are nothing if not stubborn.
• Headline: U. S. INDICTS DR. CORT; Doctor Who Went to England Cited for Draft Evasion. Impact: Dr. Cort's indictment for draft evasion became a cautionary tale for future medical professionals, leading to an underground network of doctors who would help avoid the draft using questionable medical excuses. Fact: Did you know that avoiding the draft using a 'bad back' is basically the medical equivalent of faking a sick day? Some things never change.
• Headline: ESCAPES COURT-MARTIAL; Jersey Private Is Reprimanded for Failure to Salute Flag. Impact: The private's reprimand for not saluting the flag led to an increase in military discipline regulations, which in turn inspired a generation of soldiers to salute anything in sight—even inanimate objects. Fact: Did you know that saluting the flag is so serious that forgetting it is like forgetting your mom’s birthday? You just don’t do it!.