MARCH 18, 1953

Full News Archive

• Headline: Duke of Edinburgh's German Tour. Impact: This casual jaunt by the Duke sparked a secret society of Scottish air travelers who believed they could teleport if they just believed hard enough. Spoiler: they still haven’t found the right frequency.. Fact: Did you know that Edinburgh and Germany have a longstanding rivalry over which has the best sausages? Spoiler: it's Edinburgh, especially if you add haggis!.
• Headline: Royal Lunch with Tito in London. Impact: This lunch inadvertently led to an international cookbook fad where world leaders attempted to impress each other with their culinary skills, resulting in some questionable dishes like 'Communist Casserole'.. Fact: Did you know that Tito once tried to convince the Queen to adopt a Yugoslavian dish? Apparently, she politely declined, preferring her sandwiches without a side of communism..
• Headline: Ousted Radio Official's Investigative Inquiry. Impact: This event led to a series of convoluted conspiracy theories suggesting that the ousted official was actually an undercover agent attempting to uncover a plot involving pigeons and secret signals.. Fact: Did you know that radio waves were once thought to be a form of magic? Luckily, the 20th century brought us science, and now we just have magic that involves WiFi passwords..
• Headline: U. S. Troops Shatter Red Thrust in Korea; U. S. UNIT SHATTERS RED KOREA THRUST. Impact: The fierce fighting at Little Gibraltar eventually turned into a popular video game level, where players could reenact the battle, much to the dismay of actual historians.. Fact: Did you know that 'Little Gibraltar' was actually named after a local bar where soldiers gathered, not the famous rock? Because nothing says military strength like a pint of ale..
• Headline: FREEZE' POWER FAVORED; U. S. Chamber and Chemists Are for 90-Day Plan in a Crisis. Impact: The 90-day freeze led to a nationwide obsession with frozen food, resulting in the invention of the microwave, which would eventually save countless college students from cooking disasters.. Fact: Did you know that the only thing colder than the freeze plan was the reception of frozen peas at family dinners? They still haven’t forgiven the 90s..
• Headline: MICHAEL O'CONE. Impact: This headline inadvertently led to a time-traveling conspiracy that Michael O'Cone was actually a future time lord who had come back to fix history, one headline at a time.. Fact: Did you know that Michael O'Cone’s name has been used in secret codes to identify time travelers? Unfortunately, no one remembers the code..
• Headline: Queen Mary Is Comfortable. Impact: Queen Mary's comfort became a symbol of royal resilience, inspiring an entire generation of comfort-seekers who believed that all their problems could be solved with a plush armchair.. Fact: Did you know that comfort is highly subjective? What’s comfortable for one person might be a medieval torture device for another!.
• Headline: JUDGE LE ROY HACKETT. Impact: The mere mention of Judge Hackett’s name led to a series of courtroom dramas that inspired countless TV shows, leading to the phrase, 'If it’s not on TV, did it really happen?'. Fact: Did you know that Judge Le Roy Hackett's courtroom was once known as 'The Hackett Show'? Viewers tuned in for the drama, but stayed for the justice..
• Headline: TRUST TRIAL AIRS G. M. BONUS PLANS; Sloan Ridicules U. S. Charges That du Ponts Benefited by Payments to Executives. Impact: This trial caused a ripple effect, leading to the modern concept of corporate bonuses that are so large, they could probably fund a small country if only they weren't tied up in golden parachutes.. Fact: Did you know that the only thing more inflated than executive bonuses is the average American’s disillusionment with corporate ethics?.