MARCH 10, 1953

Full News Archive

• Headline: Natural Gasoline Plant Development in 1953. Impact: The construction of the natural gasoline plant in Williston, ND, inadvertently led to an oil boom that attracted aspiring Hollywood stars looking for a change of pace. Who knew that the next big movie about oil tycoons and their existential crises would be filmed in the middle of nowhere?. Fact: Did you know that natural gasoline is just a fancy term for 'let’s hope this doesn’t explode'?.
• Headline: Tax Evasion Indictments in 1953. Impact: The indictment of M Siegler, S Blatt, I Bogen, and Pan-Rose Frocks Corp triggered a wave of overly cautious fashion designers, who began adding disclaimers to their clothing labels. 'This dress may or may not cause financial ruin' became a popular tagline.. Fact: It’s ironic that a dress company went under for tax evasion when they could have just sold their dresses for a fortune on Etsy..
• Headline: Welfare Revision Proposal in Albany. Impact: The welfare revision in Albany led to a nationwide trend of politicians proposing cuts while simultaneously increasing their own salaries. Talk about a win-win for them, but a lose-lose for those in need!. Fact: They say money can’t buy happiness, but apparently it can buy a few extra zeros on a politician's paycheck..
• Headline: U. S.-Brazilian Accord Reached. Impact: The US-Brazilian accord opened the floodgates for bizarre fruit exports, leading to a mini-obsession with acai bowls that would eventually cause hipsters to develop a sense of entitlement over brunch.. Fact: Fun fact: The acai berry has more antioxidants than your average politician’s promises!.
• Headline: Named Deputy Chief Here By Atomic Energy Office. Impact: The appointment of F M Belmore as deputy manager of the Atomic Energy Office set off a decades-long debate about who really has the best job title. Spoiler alert: 'Deputy Chief of Atomic Energy' wins every time.. Fact: Did you know that in the world of atomic energy, 'deputy' sounds way cooler than 'assistant'?.
• Headline: CAMARDA DENIES THEFT; Former Union Officer to Be Tried on Larceny Charge. Impact: A V Camarda’s denial of theft inspired a series of 'How to Deny Everything' workshops for union leaders, paving the way for future generations to master the art of deflection.. Fact: If only denying theft were an Olympic sport, Camarda would have a gold medal by now!.
• Headline: AUSTRIAN PARTIES AGREE; Two Main Groups Will Form Coalition Government. Impact: The coalition government formed by the Austrian parties laid the groundwork for a series of political sitcoms in the 21st century, where the punchline is always the same: 'We can’t agree on anything!'. Fact: In Austria, forming a coalition government is like trying to get roommates to agree on pizza toppings—good luck with that!.
• Headline: Magsaysay Joins Quirino's Foes In Bid for Philippine Presidency; MAGSAYSAY ENTERS PHILIPPINE RACE. Impact: Magsaysay’s entry into the Philippine presidential race marked the beginning of political rivalries that would inspire countless melodramatic soap operas, complete with love triangles and betrayal.. Fact: In the Philippines, the political landscape is so dramatic that you might need popcorn just to keep up with the plot twists!.
• Headline: STRAUSS IS APPOINTED TO ATOM LIAISON POST. Impact: Strauss being appointed to the atom liaison post made him the go-to guy for awkward dinner conversations about nuclear energy, forever changing the way families discuss their weekend plans.. Fact: Having an 'atom liaison' sounds fancy until you realize it’s just a glorified way of saying 'nuclear babysitter.'.