JULY 28, 1950

Full News Archive

• Headline: Pythians Retain Dues Amid Controversy. Impact: The Pythians' decision to retain dues sparked a chain reaction that ultimately led to the invention of the 'Dues Payer's Club'—a secret society of people who pay their dues but never attend any meetings. A true accomplishment in procrastination.. Fact: Did you know that if you gather all the dues withheld over the years, you could probably fund a small country? Or at least a really good pizza party..
• Headline: Truman's Atomic Bomb Stance in 1950. Impact: Truman's atomic bomb ban was a pivotal moment that led to an alternate timeline where all countries decided to solve disputes with interpretive dance instead of nuclear weapons. Surprisingly, it was less destructive but much more awkward.. Fact: Fun fact: Truman's fervent hopes for peace were almost as powerful as the actual atomic bomb. Almost..
• Headline: House Votes on Truman's Economic Controls. Impact: The House group's vote for economic controls led to the rise of the 'Control Freaks' movement, where citizens started controlling everything from their diets to their neighbor's lawn care practices. Spoiler: It didn't end well.. Fact: Did you know that economic controls are just a fancy way of saying, 'We have no idea what we're doing, but let's pretend we do!'?.
• Headline: PHILIAS A. GRIGNON. Impact: Philias A. Grignon's existence might have delayed the invention of the email by at least a decade, as everyone was too busy trying to pronounce his name correctly to focus on communication technology.. Fact: Fun fact: Philias A. Grignon is believed to have invented the word 'Grignonize,' which means to make something sound much more important than it actually is..
• Headline: NEW SHIFFRIN PLAY TO ARRIVE IN FALL; AT SUMMER PLAYHOUSE. Impact: The arrival of Shiffrin’s new play was the catalyst for a nationwide obsession with summer playhouses, which led to a bizarre trend of people trying to build their own in backyards, resulting in less space for barbecues.. Fact: Did you know that summer playhouses are basically just fancy shacks where people pretend to be cultured while sipping iced tea?.
• Headline: REV. C. DRISCOLL. Impact: Rev. C. Driscoll's influence was so profound that it inspired a series of poorly written self-help books titled 'How to Driscoll Your Life,' which sold millions but provided absolutely no guidance.. Fact: Fun fact: Rev. Driscoll once tried to teach a cat to pray. Spoiler alert: It didn't go well..
• Headline: HALSEY HONORED BY PROPELLER CLUB. Impact: Halsey’s honorary membership in the Propeller Club led to a strange obsession with propellers across the U.S., culminating in a bizarre national holiday dedicated to all things spinning. Yes, it was as pointless as it sounds.. Fact: Did you know that the Propeller Club is not actually about propellers? It's just a fancy name for people who really love boats and puns..
• Headline: U.S. Puts a Lien on Sally Rand. Impact: The U.S. putting a lien on Sally Rand's income tax was the moment when the IRS realized they could also be seen as the villains in a soap opera—a twist nobody saw coming until it was too late.. Fact: Fun fact: Sally Rand became famous for her fan dance, which is not to be confused with her later career as a tax consultant. Just kidding, she didn't do that..
• Headline: 4 PIANISTS ARE SOLOISTS; Perform Vivaldi-Bach Work at Stadium With Philharmonic. Impact: The performance of Vivaldi-Bach at the stadium was the moment when classical music decided it could coexist with sports. This led to the first-ever 'Classical Music & Hot Dog' festival. It was as chaotic as it sounds.. Fact: Did you know that four pianists playing together is known as a 'piano quartet'? Or as I like to call it, 'a cacophony in perfect harmony.'.
• Headline: G.OLNEY, EX-COUNSEL OF BROOKLYN EDISON. Impact: G. Olney's role as ex-counsel of Brooklyn Edison sparked a series of neighborhood debates about whether electricians needed legal counsel, which eventually led to a reality show called 'Lawyers & Lightbulbs.' It was a hit in some alternate universe.. Fact: Fun fact: G. Olney's legal advice often included, 'Just don't get caught,' which is probably why he’s now an ex-counsel..