APRIL 16, 1950

Full News Archive

• Headline: Advocating for Theatre Subsidies in America. Impact: If theatre subsidies had taken off, we might have seen a world where Shakespearean plays were the norm in every high school, leading to generations of confused teenagers asking, 'To be or not to be... is that a tax write-off?'. Fact: Theatre subsidies are kind of like giving a kid a cookie before dinner—everyone’s happy until they realize they’ve ruined their appetite for the good stuff..
• Headline: Celebrating Wordsworth's 100th Anniversary. Impact: Celebrating Wordsworth's centenary likely inspired a poetry revival that led to a rise in middle-aged men with berets and bad mustaches trying to impress their dates with 'deep thoughts' and terrible sonnets.. Fact: Wordsworth once said, 'Poetry is the spontaneous overflow of powerful feelings.' Apparently, he never had to deal with a toddler's tantrum..
• Headline: Spain's Housing Crisis of 1950. Impact: This housing crisis might have inadvertently led to the invention of the modern 'tiny house' movement, where people started embracing minimalism because... well, they had no choice.. Fact: Spain's housing woes have been around longer than your last relationship—it's a classic case of everyone wanting a place to call home but no one knowing how to build one..
• Headline: NIMITZ HOLDS U.N. IS DOING GOOD JOB; Believes Use of Force, Though Provided For, Would Mean Ruin of World Agency Can't Stop a Pearl Harbor. Impact: Nimitz's faith in the U.N. could be seen as the spark that led to decades of diplomatic meetings that achieved nothing but fancy paper and the occasional coffee break.. Fact: The U.N. has been around so long that it probably has a collection of 'I Survived Another Diplomatic Summit' t-shirts..
• Headline: SILVER CUP BRINGS $1,800; Cromwellian Tankard Dated 1654 Is Auctioned for $1,600. Impact: The sale of historic items like this tankard could have led to a frenzy of antique hoarding, resulting in a future where everyone owns a piece of history but has no idea how to use it.. Fact: That tankard could probably tell some wild stories—like the one time it was mistaken for a fancy coffee mug at a modern brunch..
• Headline: Why We Worship The Babe Ruths; Our addiction to baseball begins in infancy and thrives on statistics, idolatry and lore. Why We Worship the Babe Ruths. Impact: Babe Ruth’s legacy might have inadvertently made baseball the go-to sport for dads everywhere, spawning an entire generation of children who had no choice but to memorize statistics instead of enjoying their childhood.. Fact: Baseball is the only sport where you can fail 70% of the time and still be considered a hero. Talk about setting the bar low!.
• Headline: Design's The Thing. Impact: The focus on design led to an explosion of 'minimalist' trends, which basically means people pay extra for less—thanks, capitalism!. Fact: Modern design is just the art of making everything look good while hiding the fact that it probably cost an arm and a leg..
• Headline: In Brief: General Books; Bits of Memory Planet in Maps Traveler and Alone Bandmaster of Boston. Impact: The rise of books and maps in the literary world likely paved the way for countless people to get lost—both literally and figuratively—on their journeys, fueling a flourishing market for GPS devices in the future.. Fact: Books have been known to take readers on journeys—just not always to the places they intended to go. Sometimes it’s just a trip to the couch..
• Headline: E.S. BOWLING DEAD; TOBACCO LEADER, 74; Former Official of P. Lorillard and Other Firms in Field Was Trustee of Duke U.. Impact: The passing of a tobacco leader marks a significant point in the ongoing battle over public health, potentially influencing future generations to debate the merits of smoking while hiding their vapes behind their backs.. Fact: Tobacco leaders are like ancient Roman emperors—often revered in their time but notorious for leading their followers to ruin..