JUNE 27, 1949

Full News Archive

• Headline: Newsman Sentenced for Disrespecting Perón. Impact: This newsman's suspension over disrespect might have inadvertently inspired future journalists to adopt a more sarcastic tone to avoid such punishments. Thanks, Marzano, for paving the way for snarky headlines!. Fact: Fun Fact: 'Disrespect' is just a fancy way of saying 'I didn't laugh at the president's jokes.'.
• Headline: Navy Unveils Largest Wind Tunnel. Impact: The dedication of the largest wind tunnel could have sparked a chain reaction of aerodynamic breakthroughs, possibly resulting in today’s flying cars or, at the very least, some very smug engineers.. Fact: Did you know that wind tunnels are basically the fancy, adult version of blowing on your soup to cool it down?.
• Headline: GOV. FULLER WARREN WEDS A CALIFORNIAN. Impact: Governor Fuller Warren's marriage might have inadvertently led to a trend of political couples attempting to outshine each other, ultimately culminating in a reality TV show starring governors and their spouses.. Fact: Did you know that marrying a Californian automatically qualifies you for a lifetime supply of avocado toast?.
• Headline: GOETHE DISPLAY TO OPEN; Musicians Poet Knew the Theme of Library's Exhibition. Impact: Goethe's influence on music might have inspired a whole generation to start pairing their poetry with random soundtracks, potentially leading to the birth of the modern mixtape, or at least a lot of confused playlists.. Fact: Fun Fact: Goethe once wrote a novel about a guy who was just really bad at making decisions. Spoiler alert: he never finishes it..
• Headline: Bias in City Schools Found In Survey by Episcopalians; SCHOOL BIAS FOUND BY EPISCOPALIANS. Impact: This survey by Episcopalians might have been the catalyst for educational reforms that trickled down to future decades, where everyone finally learned that no one likes being judged by their school’s cafeteria food.. Fact: Did you know that the only thing more biased than school policies is a kid’s opinion on broccoli?.
• Headline: ITU CANDIDATES LISTED; Independent Group to Pick Chiefs at August Convention. Impact: The formation of an independent group to challenge the existing administration could have been a pivotal moment in political history, showing that sometimes all it takes is a handful of disgruntled citizens and a strong coffee to change the course of a nation.. Fact: Did you know that 'independent' really just means 'we don’t like either option, but we’ll complain about it anyway'?.
• Headline: DR. PHILIPSON COLLAPSES; Dean of the Reform Rabbis Is in a Boston Hospital. Impact: Dr. Philipson's collapse could have led to advancements in healthcare practices, as hospitals everywhere scrambled to figure out how to prevent their most revered members from fainting at conferences.. Fact: Fun Fact: Hospitals are like the DMV, but with more fainting spells and fewer snack machines..
• Headline: ' RENT FREEZE PAST,' WOODS EASES RULES FOR NEW INCREASES; Federal Housing Expediter to Permit Rises for Porches or Improved Services MASTER TV AERIAL CITED Additions of Maids, Laundries, Space for a Garden Also May Justify Advances U. S. EASES RULES FOR RISES IN RENT. Impact: The easing of rent rules might have been the initial spark that led to the rental market looking like a game of Monopoly, where only the rich get to build hotels while the rest of us just try to avoid landing on Boardwalk.. Fact: Did you know that the only thing scarier than rent increases are the hidden fees that come with every new apartment? It’s like a surprise party, but nobody’s celebrating..
• Headline: All 24 in Guard Plane Are lnjured As It Dives in Portland (Me.) River; Pilot of C-47 Carrying Band Members Says Brakes Failed on Runway Near Stream -- Airport Reports Warning Ignored. Impact: The crash of the Guard plane could have been a catalyst for stricter safety measures in aviation, preventing future incidents where 'oops, the brakes failed' was a valid excuse for getting a free ride to the ER.. Fact: Fun Fact: 'Flying by the seat of your pants' took on a whole new meaning after this crash, as 24 people found themselves questioning their life choices mid-flight..