MARCH 21, 1948

Full News Archive

• Headline: Jet Power Revolutionizes Aviation Discussion. Impact: The reluctance to develop commercial jet power led to decades of gloriously inefficient air travel, resulting in the invention of the in-flight safety demonstration—because who wouldn't want to know how to use a seatbelt at 30,000 feet?. Fact: Did you know that the jet engine was initially invented so that people could fly faster than they could complain about the food?.
• Headline: Chilean Pres Predicts Stalin's Fate. Impact: Chilean President Gonzalez’s prediction about Hitler's end for Stalin led to some serious game theory in global politics, ultimately resulting in a few dozen conspiracy theories about who would take over the world next—spoiler alert: none of them were right.. Fact: Did you know that predicting the end of dictators never actually works out? It’s like betting on a horse that’s already broken its leg..
• Headline: MARSHALL INSISTS ON 'URGENT' ACTION TO CHECK TYRANNY; He Says Experience Proves That Democracies, Once Alert, Can Defeat Dictatorships. Impact: Marshall's insistence on urgent action to check tyranny set off a chain reaction that would eventually lead to more meetings than anyone cares to count, yet somehow, tyranny is still thriving—great job, everyone!. Fact: Did you know that 'urgent' in political terms often means 'let's schedule a meeting for next quarter'?.
• Headline: MISSIONARIES SOUGHT; Salvation Army Wants Recruits for Africa, India, Far East. Impact: The Salvation Army's call for missionaries sparked an influx of idealistic souls who believed they could change the world—creating a delightful mix of cultural appropriation and utopian dreams.. Fact: Did you know that missionaries are basically the original influencers? They just had to do it without Instagram..
• Headline: U.H. GROUP RULES ON KOREAH BALLOT; Commission Voices Concern Over Possible Role of Police in Voting on May 9. Impact: The UN's concerns over police involvement in the Korean ballot led to a slippery slope where elections became more like reality TV shows, complete with drama, plot twists, and a lot of questionable decisions.. Fact: Did you know that 'election season' is just another way of saying 'let's watch democracy try to work while the police play referee'?.
• Headline: CAMERA NOTES; F/1.4 Lens for 16mm Movie Camera -- Exhibits. Impact: The introduction of the F/1.4 lens for cameras revolutionized the way we see the world, allowing people to capture blurry moments of their lives that they would later regret posting on social media.. Fact: Did you know that the F/1.4 lens is basically the photographic equivalent of trying to take a selfie with a potato? It's all about the lighting!.
• Headline: ALL TRIVIAL FOND RECORDS. By Allanah Harper. 238 pp. New York: Harper & Bros. $3.. Impact: Allanah Harper's 'All Trivial Fond Records' became a cult classic, inspiring future generations to embrace the mundane and turn it into art—because who doesn’t love a good story about nothing?. Fact: Did you know that writing about trivial things is how most of us feel about our own lives? Welcome to the club!.