MAY 22, 1947

Full News Archive

• Headline: Pope Welcomes Sailors in Naples. Impact: This humble greeting from Pope Pius XII to U.S. sailors was the catalyst for a secret society of sailors who would later influence global diplomacy by inventing the term 'nautical diplomacy.' Little did they know, their efforts would eventually lead to the invention of sailor tattoos and the world's first 'talk like a pirate' day. Fact: Fun fact: Those sailors were probably more excited about the Pope's greeting than their next port of call – and that’s saying something!.
• Headline: Army Recruiting Declines in 1947. Impact: The sharp drop in army recruitment led to a nationwide panic that resulted in the first-ever 'Recruitment Day' festivals, where people dressed up as soldiers and paraded around town, inadvertently boosting the costume industry. The irony? They were just trying to avoid actually joining the military. Fact: Did you know that this was the same year schools decided that the best way to increase army recruitment was to teach kids how to dodge responsibility?.
• Headline: Private Offices Under Park Ave. Ramp. Impact: This revelation about Haslett’s private offices created a ripple effect that caused conspiracy theorists to believe that underground parking lots were actually portals to alternate dimensions. Who knew parking could lead to inter-dimensional travel?. Fact: Fun fact: The only thing deeper than the tunnel under Park Ave was the city’s need for better urban planning.
• Headline: The Two Houses Elect. Impact: The election of the House of Representatives Speaker sparked a series of events where every speaker since has had to outdo their predecessor’s ridiculous speeches, leading to a dramatic increase in the use of interpretive dance in politics. Thank you, democracy!. Fact: Did you know that some people think the Speaker's job is just to keep the gavel warm while others do the actual work? You might not be wrong!.
• Headline: SINCLAIR EARNINGS ABOVE THOSE IN '46; Oil Company's President Says Exploration Is in Progress in Ethiopian Field. Impact: Sinclair's earnings report led to a surge in oil exploration that would eventually lead to the environmental disaster of the century. Who knew that profits could destroy ecosystems faster than you could say ‘fossil fuels’?. Fact: Fun fact: The president of Sinclair probably had a better grasp on the oil crisis than most politicians – but that’s just a theory.
• Headline: SHUTDOWN BY FORD IN 3 DAYS EXPECTED; Production Crippled as 4,000 Foremen Strike for 'Rights,' Not Wages, in Detroit SHUTDOWN BY FORD IN 3 DAYS LOOMS. Impact: The Ford shutdown sparked a nationwide 'Rights Movement' that prompted workers everywhere to demand, well, rights. The irony? This led to the eventual rise of the 'work-life balance' movement, which ironically also made people want to work less. Thanks, foremen!. Fact: Did you know the foremen were actually more concerned about their 'rights' than their wages? Talk about a noble cause!.
• Headline: Children's Gifts to Europe. Impact: The children's gifts to Europe might have inspired the first reality show about charity, where kids from America compete to send the most extravagant gifts. Spoiler alert: it didn’t quite catch on. Fact: Fun fact: Those gifts probably included more candy than actual supplies – because who doesn’t want a sugar rush while recovering from war?.
• Headline: Briton Gets Eight Years. Impact: This Briton's sentence for wartime broadcasts led to the establishment of a long-standing tradition of punishing bad broadcasting, which has since evolved into the modern practice of muting obnoxious political ads. Some things never change!. Fact: Did you know that broadcasting during wartime was considered a crime? I guess the real war was against bad radio shows!.