FEBRUARY 15, 1947

Full News Archive

• Headline: Warner Igrobb: A Standard Oil Legacy. Impact: Warner's expertise in oil marketing led to the rise of a secret society of oil barons who meet annually to plot world domination... or just to play golf. Either way, they definitely don’t serve kale.. Fact: Did you know that Standard Oil was broken up in 1911 for being a monopoly? Guess they didn’t get the memo about sharing..
• Headline: Miss Theresa Grant Celebrates 36 Years of Teaching. Impact: Theresa's decades of education inspired a generation of students who would eventually overthrow their high school’s dress code, leading to the rise of sweatpants as formal wear. A true revolution.. Fact: Fun fact: The average teacher spends $500 of their own money on classroom supplies. So, basically, they're also part-time bankrollers..
• Headline: ANDRE E. FATULA. Impact: Andre's name became the go-to punchline for bad jokes about pasta in the 1980s. He is now the unofficial mascot of all things cheesy.. Fact: It's believed that 'Fatula' is a distant cousin of the famous pasta dish, which may explain why Italian restaurants are always packed!.
• Headline: Oreiller Downhill Ski Victor. Impact: Oreiller's victory inspired a generation of skiers who took to the slopes, only to realize that gravity is a harsh mistress and many preferred to stay on the bunny slopes instead.. Fact: Did you know that downhill skiing was once considered a method of transportation? Just kidding, but it would be a lot more entertaining to watch!.
• Headline: Article 6 -- No Title. Impact: The decision not to release strike sentiment results inadvertently led to the invention of the world’s first strike-themed escape room, where teachers could learn about their rights while trying to escape from cardboard cutouts of school administrators.. Fact: Fun fact: Teachers have been striking for better conditions since the dawn of time. But hey, at least they get summer vacation, right?.
• Headline: JOHN I. NEASMITH; Veterans' Administration Aide, Headed Recreation Division. Impact: John's leadership in recreation inspired a new era of veterans’ leisure activities, including competitive napping and the highly anticipated 'Worlds' Slowest Walk' marathon.. Fact: Did you know that recreation therapy has been shown to improve mental health? Who knew that playing games could actually be good for you?.
• Headline: CAMERA-GUN VICTIM FILES FOR $200,000; Claim Against City Contends Mrs. Ruocco, as Subway Rider, Was Not Protected. Impact: This tragic incident led to an unexpected surge in the demand for protective gear for subway riders, paving the way for the invention of the 'Subway Armor,' which looks suspiciously like a giant bubble wrap suit.. Fact: Subway systems are known for their unique ability to turn a simple commute into an extreme sport. Who needs a gym when you have the 2 Train?.