NOVEMBER 16, 1946

Full News Archive

• Headline: Historic Auction of Mrs. Dwight Davis' Estate. Impact: The sale of Mrs. Dwight Davis's bookcase sparked a nationwide craze for overpriced furniture, leading to the eventual rise of hipster furniture boutiques that would charge $1,050 for a chair made from reclaimed wood and sadness.. Fact: This bookcase was rumored to have held the secrets of the universe, or at least a lot of dusty novels that no one ever read..
• Headline: Dishwashing Innovation and Candy Making Kits. Impact: The introduction of the self-supplying hot water dishwasher led to a surge in domestic disputes over who would actually load the thing. Spoiler: it was always the person who didn't want to.. Fact: Before this dishwasher, people actually had to wash dishes by hand. Can you imagine the horror? The horror!.
• Headline: REPUBLICANS SLATE TOP SENATE POSTS; New Set-Up Makes Vandenberg President Pro-Tempore, White Leader, Taft Steering Head. Impact: The new Republican leadership structure resulted in a series of increasingly convoluted debates that would eventually lead to the creation of the phrase 'politics as usual,' which has since been used to excuse absolutely everything.. Fact: These Senate posts were so highly coveted, they might as well have been gold-plated. Because who doesn’t want to argue with their colleagues while sitting on a throne of power?.
• Headline: LESNEVICH AND FOX TO BOX HERE FEB. 28; Title Bout Listed for Garden --Baltimore Group Proposes Louis-Sheppard Fight. Impact: The planned boxing match between Lesnevich and Fox revived interest in heavyweight boxing, which ultimately led to an array of celebrity boxing matches that we now regret as a society.. Fact: Boxing used to be a way to settle disputes until someone decided that YouTube comments would suffice..
• Headline: FOOTBALL DRAFT IS SET; National League Meeting to Be Held in Play-Off City, Dec. 16. Impact: The football draft meeting set the precedent for all future drafts, which means we now have entire weekends dedicated to watching people in suits pick college players while we pretend to care.. Fact: The first draft was so boring that fans had a better time watching paint dry on the walls of the drafting room..
• Headline: FRANCE TO MEDIATE TRIESTE DEADLOCK; Will Submit Compromise Plan to Big 4 Today in Effort to Break Stalemate on Police. Impact: France's mediation efforts in the Trieste deadlock made them the unofficial referees of international disputes, paving the way for everyone to argue about anything that happens in a café.. Fact: The French always seem to end up in the middle of a diplomatic mess, probably because they can't resist a good debate over a baguette..
• Headline: World Series Films for Troops. Impact: Showing World Series films to troops not only boosted morale but also somehow convinced everyone that watching sports is a valid form of emotional therapy. This trend continues to today, with sports bars being the new therapy sessions.. Fact: During the war, movies were the only thing soldiers looked forward to, aside from the occasional care package filled with snacks and love letters..