JULY 22, 1945

Full News Archive

• Headline: Exploring Post-War Soviet Ideology. Impact: Little did they know, the discussions about the Soviet system would lead to endless debates on Twitter in the 21st century, where everyone thinks they're a geopolitical expert after watching one documentary.. Fact: The Soviet Union collapsed in 1991, and yet, here we are, still debating the merits of communism over a cup of overpriced coffee..
• Headline: Anti-Braden Drive Protests Intensify. Impact: The anti-Braden sentiment led to an increase in 'How to Insult Your Foreign Envoy' workshops, which are still thriving today in the art of diplomatic relations.. Fact: Insulting a diplomatic envoy in a theatre? Now that's what I call a dramatic performance!.
• Headline: German Captives Sulk On Job to Get Cigars. Impact: This act of bribery with cigars likely inspired the next generation of workers who decided that compensation in chocolate was a valid job perk.. Fact: Who knew the key to productivity was just a well-timed cigar break? Forget motivational posters!.
• Headline: DE GAULLE ASSAILS LEFT-WING STAND; Insists Powers of Assembly Be Curbed to Avoid Rule by 'Omnipotent' Body. Impact: De Gaulle's warning about omnipotent bodies led to a century of politicians trying to figure out how to avoid being the 'omnipotent' body themselves—spoiler alert: they didn't figure it out.. Fact: The real tragedy here? The platform collapse was not due to politics, but probably because someone forgot to check the weight limit!.
• Headline: THREE BIG UNCERTAINTIES AT BIG THREE MEETING; Complexity of Problems, Russia's Aims And America's Role Create Doubts. Impact: The doubts spawned from this meeting set the stage for the Cold War and every subsequent political thriller movie ever made. Thanks for the drama, guys!. Fact: The Big Three? More like the Big Three Who Can't Make Up Their Minds. Cue the awkward silence and shuffling of feet..
• Headline: Insuring the Public's Health. Impact: This initiative paved the way for health insurance companies to become the new gatekeepers of public health, leading to endless paperwork and 'you are not covered' letters.. Fact: Funny how 'insuring health' turned into 'insuring profits.' Who knew the word 'public' could be so... exclusive?.
• Headline: Will Export Horses to Europe. Impact: This noble export led to an unexpected boom in European horse racing, which in turn gave rise to the world's most extravagant betting habits, because why not gamble on horses?. Fact: Exporting horses? Sounds like a pretty 'stable' economy move to me!.
• Headline: NEW JUDGES NAMED FOR KENNEL SHOW; Westchester Club Complies With ODT Order to Stage 27th Event on Sept. 9. Impact: The naming of new judges for the kennel show inspired future generations to take judging dogs as seriously as judging politicians—both of whom are equally likely to roll over.. Fact: Fun fact: Dog shows are the only place where judges are judged more harshly than the contestants. Seems fair, right?.
• Headline: People Who Read and Write; Weegee. Impact: Weegee's contributions to photography and journalism sparked a chain of events that led to everyone and their mother becoming 'influencers'—thanks a lot, Weegee.. Fact: Weegee was known for his gritty street photography, which is basically the 1940s version of oversharing on social media!.