MAY 29, 1945

Full News Archive

• Headline: Political Leaders Unite in NYC Elections. Impact: This week of Democratic wheeling and dealing rippled through time, leading to every future political debate being a cringe-worthy spectacle of promises no one intends to keep. Thank you, O'Dwyer and Flynn, for setting the bar low.. Fact: Fun fact: Political parties are like the fast-food chains of democracy—everyone has their favorite, but they all leave you feeling a little empty inside..
• Headline: Knut Hamsun Arrested Post-War. Impact: Knut Hamsun's arrest sent shockwaves through the literary world, leading to a future where writers must now be extra careful not to be pro-anything that might get them detained. The irony? He inspired generations of writers who are now too afraid to write.. Fact: Did you know Hamsun won the Nobel Prize in Literature? Guess he should have stuck to writing instead of making headlines for the wrong reasons..
• Headline: WFA Charges 'Corner' in Rye On Chicago Market in 1944; Claims 89% of Available Supply Was Held by General Foods Corporation and Members of Board of Trade Denies There Was a 'Corner'. Impact: The allegations of a 'corner' in rye could have led to a future where bread was traded on the stock market. Imagine your loaf of bread coming with a side of stock options—deliciously absurd.. Fact: If you think the stock market is wild today, just remember that people once speculated on rye! Next time you enjoy a sandwich, consider how close you came to investing in it..
• Headline: SEES KITCHEN CEASING TO BE 'HOLE-IN-WALL'. Impact: The kitchen design revolution sparked by this article led to the creation of an entire generation of Pinterest boards dedicated to 'functional planning'—because who doesn't want to be inspired by a picture of a neatly organized spice rack?. Fact: Did you know that the kitchen is often called the 'heart of the home'? It’s a shame the heart beats slower when you’re stuck in a 'hole-in-the-wall' kitchen..
• Headline: GUY ROBERT DU COSTAL; French Poet, Had Been Leader in Resistance Movement. Impact: Guy Robert Du Costal's leadership in the Resistance formed a narrative that inspired future generations to believe that poetry could save the world. Spoiler: it didn’t, but it sure made for some dramatic Instagram captions.. Fact: Did you know that resistance movements often feature poets? They’re the ones who remind us that the fight for freedom can be beautifully worded, even if it doesn’t always rhyme..
• Headline: Elected Vice Presidents Of I.T. & T. Corporation. Impact: The election of vice presidents at I.T. & T. Corporation set a precedent for corporate bureaucracy that still plagues us today. They say history repeats itself, but in this case, it just keeps adding more layers of paperwork.. Fact: Did you know that 'vice president' is just corporate code for 'we need someone to blame if this goes wrong'?.
• Headline: Water, Water Everywhere In City's Four Reservoirs. Impact: The overflowing reservoirs became a cautionary tale about water management, leading future cities to invest billions in infrastructure while still managing to run out of water during a drought. Thanks a lot, Croton.. Fact: Did you know that water is life? But apparently, not enough to prevent city planners from having to scramble during water shortages..
• Headline: MEAT QUOTAS TO STAND; OPA Bars Change Even in Areas Having Extra Cattle and Hogs. Impact: By refusing to ease meat quotas, the OPA ensured that barbecue parties would be uncomfortably small for decades. The future generations of pitmasters were left wondering why they couldn't get their hands on a brisket.. Fact: The OPA's meat quota policies were so strict that they could make a butcher cry. Imagine rationing meat—what a way to ruin a good steak dinner!.