NOVEMBER 13, 1942

Full News Archive

• Headline: Lawyers Mobilized for War Efforts. Impact: The desperate hunt for lawyers to fill war jobs inadvertently spurred the rise of legal sitcoms in the 1980s, as everyone was like, 'Where did all the lawyers go?' Spoiler: They were busy saving the world.. Fact: Lawyers were once thought to be as rare as unicorns during wartime. Weirdly enough, they still manage to pop up for every reality TV show audition..
• Headline: Senate Committee's War Work Recommendations. Impact: The recommendations from the Senate committee to convert plants for war work inadvertently sparked a bizarre fascination with factories, leading to the creation of the 'Factory Tour' industry, which is still a thing, for some reason.. Fact: Fun fact: The Senate Investigating Committee’s recommendations are basically the predecessors to every ‘How It’s Made’ episode. You can thank them for your newfound love of conveyor belts..
• Headline: Vultee Reveals Two New Stinson Planes; One Is an Aerial Jeep Called Sentinel. Impact: Introducing the Aerial Jeep, also known as the Sentinel, sparked a long-standing joke about vehicles that could fly but still required a manual. This led to the invention of the flying car—just kidding, we still don't have those.. Fact: The name 'Sentinel' was chosen because 'Flying Brick' didn't inspire much confidence in its aerodynamics or safety..
• Headline: C.I.O. URGES WLB BROADEN POLICIES; Calls for Industry-Wide Plan of Collective Bargaining and Wage Stabilization JOHN L. LEWIS DENOUNCED Murray Put Out of Coal Union, Discloses Roosevelt Offer in Captive Mine Case. Impact: The C.I.O. urging for broader policies led to the birth of countless corporate jargon terms like 'synergy' and 'value-added.' Thanks to this, we now have meetings for meetings!. Fact: John L. Lewis was once a coal miner who became a labor leader. Imagine going from digging in the dirt to digging through paperwork!.
• Headline: Front Page 2 -- No Title. Impact: By putting communications under government control, Argentina set the stage for today's conspiracy theorists, who are convinced that every odd tweet is a government plot. Spoiler: It’s just a cat meme.. Fact: Government control of communications has led to more rumors than actual news. Thanks, Argentina, for the original fake news!.
• Headline: SERGEANT KILLED IN AUTO; George Roegele of Brooklyn Was on Duty at San Diego. Impact: The tragic death of Sergeant Roegele in an auto accident reminded the military of the importance of safe driving, leading to the implementation of more boring safety videos—because who doesn't love a good PowerPoint on seat belts?. Fact: Sergeant Roegele’s story is a poignant reminder that sometimes the greatest dangers lie not in battle, but in the mundane act of driving. Buckle up, folks..
• Headline: MISS WELTY WINS TOP O. HENRY PRIZE; Takes Short Story Award of $300 -- Stegner, Schramm, Miss Wylie Selected 21 TALES IN 1942 VOLUME Brickell, Editor of Collection, Finds Material Available Refutes Criticism. Impact: Miss Welty winning the O. Henry Prize inadvertently inspired countless aspiring writers to take up short stories, leading to a surge in coffee shop writing sessions that still plague our Instagram feeds today.. Fact: Winning an O. Henry Prize is like getting a golden ticket to the literary elite club—where everyone still pretends to understand modern poetry..
• Headline: STABILIZATION UNIT ON WAGES IS SET UP; Ready to Receive Requests for Rulings on Increases and Decreases in Pay C.A. DRAKE IS IN CHARGE Specific Instructions From Washington Expected Here Within a Few Days. Impact: The establishment of a stabilization unit on wages made it clear that the government could stabilize everything except for the economy itself. This led to a national pastime of guessing paychecks at dinner parties.. Fact: C.A. Drake probably had a great time explaining his job to family members who thought he was just a 'business guy.' Spoiler: He was more like a 'salary babysitter.'.