NOVEMBER 24, 1940

Full News Archive

• Headline: A.F.L. Plans to Combat Racketeering. Impact: The A.F.L.'s plan to crush rackets inadvertently led to a nationwide obsession with organized crime movies in the 1970s, inspiring countless directors to use the phrase 'racket' in every other sentence, thus ruining dinner conversations for decades. Fact: Isn’t it funny how unions are like bad relationships? They promise unity but always end up arguing about who gets to take out the trash.
• Headline: Wright's Stellar Batting Average in 1940. Impact: Wright's .369 batting average set off a chain reaction that would eventually lead to the invention of the batting helmet, which ironically became more useful during heated arguments over who had the better stats. Fact: Fun fact: .369 is also how many people actually pay attention to batting averages in casual conversation.
• Headline: Kenneth Roberts' 'Oliver Wiswell' Unveiled. Impact: Kenneth Roberts' stirring tale of revolutionary days inspired an entire genre of historical novels, paving the way for future authors to exploit their ancestors’ questionable decisions for profit. Fact: Did you know that 'Oliver Wiswell' was actually the original title for a book about a very indecisive cat?.
• Headline: $1,125,000,000 Cash Received Last Month. Impact: The staggering cash influx in October sparked a nationwide farming frenzy, leading to the infamous 'Pumpkin Spice Wars' of the 1980s, where farmers fought tooth and nail for the best latte flavor. Fact: It’s amazing how $1,125,000,000 can still somehow be less than what everyone spends on avocado toast in a year.
• Headline: SIR HUGH DENISON, PUBLISHER, IS DEAD; Ex-Australian Commissioner to U.S. Was Board Chairman of Associated Newspapers, Ltd. KNIGHTED 17 YEARS AGO Former Head of Sydney Sun, a Horse Breeder, Was Officer of Royal Empire Society Leader in Publishing Field Assailed Mayor Thompson. Impact: Sir Hugh Denison's death caused a minor crisis in the publishing world, leading to a temporary shortage of witty headlines, as everyone scrambled to fill the void he left behind. Fact: Sir Hugh was known for his sharp wit—so sharp that it could cut through the fluff of any press release. Too bad the same can't be said for some modern publishers.
• Headline: Notes on Rare Books; Rare Books. Impact: The 500th printing anniversary sparked the infamous 'Rare Books Club' where members debated the merits of old books versus new, ultimately leading to the invention of book-themed coffee shops where no one actually reads. Fact: It’s said that the 500th printing is a milestone that most authors only dream about—unless you’re publishing a cookbook, in which case, good luck!.
• Headline: The International Situation. Impact: Italy's admission of withdrawals led to a domino effect of diplomatic mishaps, with Greece accidentally becoming the go-to vacation spot for confused tourists who thought they were in a war zone. Fact: Historical note: the Greek front had more twists and turns than a soap opera, which is why it's often mistaken for a season finale.
• Headline: All-America Choices Announced in Women's Field Hockey; EIGHT GAIN PLACES TWO YEARS IN ROW All-America Teams Dominated by Middle Atlantic States in Women's Field Hockey NINE FROM PHILADELPHIA Reserves Include Miss Silleck of Brooklyn--Tourney Ends at Williamsburg, Va. Miss Richey Selected Northeast Beats Midwest. Impact: The dominance of Middle Atlantic states in women's field hockey led to a surge in interest in the sport, which eventually inspired a reality TV show about the lives of field hockey players—because why not?. Fact: Did you know that field hockey sticks were originally invented to fend off overly aggressive squirrels? True story!.