NOVEMBER 9, 1940

Full News Archive

• Headline: Trust Officers Warned on Upcoming Taxes. Impact: Because of this warning, a flurry of confused trust officers began hoarding tax forms like they were gold bars. This led to a bizarre underground economy where people traded tax advice like it was a rare collectible, ultimately resulting in the first-ever 'Tax Officiant' black market.. Fact: Did you know? The only thing more confusing than tax laws is trying to understand why trust officers are still called that when they clearly don't trust the government!.
• Headline: Sweden Honors Dental Surgeon. Impact: Dr. Swanson's recognition led to a surge in dental tourism in Sweden, causing the phrase 'Don't worry, it's just a filling' to become a popular vacation slogan. Dentists everywhere rejoiced!. Fact: Did you know? The only thing more painful than a root canal is trying to get a dental appointment in Sweden without a five-month waiting list..
• Headline: PRESIDENT THE 'FIRST' TO USE MIDTOWN TUBE; Precedence at Opening Denied Hundreds of Motorists. Impact: Roosevelt's midtown tube debut led to a sudden spike in tube-related puns and a long-standing rivalry between motorists and public transport enthusiasts, igniting debates that would echo through the ages.. Fact: Did you know? The only thing more congested than the midtown tube is the conversation about who really had the right of way that day..
• Headline: CALLS LUMBER PARLEY; Miss Perkins Seeks to End Strike as Defense Move. Impact: Miss Perkins' attempts to end the lumber strike led to the first-ever 'Lumberjack Olympics,' where woodchoppers competed for glory, and everyone else just tried to avoid splinters.. Fact: Did you know? The only thing more rigid than lumber industry negotiations is the lumber itself when you try to negotiate a deal for a new deck..
• Headline: CHARLES E. ARCHBALD; Inventor of 2-Color Ribbon for Typewriters Was Yachtsman. Impact: Archbald's invention sparked a fashion trend among typewriters, leading to a bizarre short-lived phase where every office had its own signature ribbon color scheme—because why not add style to the mundane?. Fact: Did you know? The 2-color ribbon was so revolutionary that typewriters were briefly considered the coolest tech gadgets—until someone invented Wi-Fi, of course..