OCTOBER 31, 1940

Full News Archive

• Headline: Roosevelt Rejects Youth in Foreign Wars. Impact: Roosevelt's insistence on avoiding foreign wars led to a butterfly effect where every time someone said 'peace,' an eagle somewhere did a backflip. This eventually resulted in more bumper stickers than actual peace treaties.. Fact: Did you know that Roosevelt was known for his 'fireside chats'? What he really meant was 'let's distract everyone with cozy radio talks while the world is on fire.'.
• Headline: Flagler's Challenge to Fish. Impact: Flagler's defeat of Fish sparked an underground movement where fish enthusiasts began secretly plotting to overthrow their oppressors. This led to the first aquatic revolution, but sadly, the fish didn't take it seriously.. Fact: I mean, who knew fish could be such a hot topic? Next thing you know, 'Fish Wars' will be a thing. Grab your popcorn!.
• Headline: City College Honors 14 Leaders. Impact: The Lock and Key election at City College created a ripple effect where students took this concept seriously, leading to an underground lock-picking club that lasted for decades. They called themselves 'The Keymasters.'. Fact: Fun fact: Lock and Key is also how you end up with a bunch of people locked in a room trying to escape their poor life choices!.
• Headline: MRS. PARSONS URGES SUPPORT FOR WILLKIE; Says He Will Remove 'Cold Hand of Government Interference'. Impact: Mrs. Parsons' support for Willkie led to an era of 'government interference' paranoia, causing conspiracy theorists to start linking government policies to alien invasions. The Cold War had nothing on this!. Fact: Who knew that the 'Cold Hand of Government Interference' was just a euphemism for a really bad handshake?.
• Headline: Questionnaires Are Put in Mails For Draft Registrants in the City; Official Notification of Order of Service Soon Will Be Learned by Men--20,000 Here Still Lack Their Serial Numbers. Impact: The draft registrants' questionnaires set in motion an avalanche of bureaucratic processes that eventually led to people writing 'please remove me from your mailing list' on government forms for decades to come.. Fact: Did you know that before this, questionnaires were just a way for people to avoid awkward small talk? Now they’re a rite of passage into adulthood!.
• Headline: BUS STRIKE IS CALLED; Greyhound Lines Between New York and Boston Affected. Impact: The bus strike not only grounded Greyhound Lines but also inspired a generation of commuters to finally consider biking to work. This led to the rise of hipster bicycle culture – complete with ironic mustaches!. Fact: Fun fact: The last time a bus strike happened, it turned into a spontaneous dance-off between disgruntled riders. Spoiler alert: The bus lost!.