JANUARY 30, 1939

Full News Archive

• Headline: Brazilian Group Discusses Trade in 1939. Impact: As the Brazilians discussed trade, a butterfly flapped its wings in the Amazon. Years later, that butterfly's descendants became the most sought-after influencers in eco-fashion, making 'green' the new black and leading to a worldwide obsession with saving the planet. Fact: Did you know that trade talks often result in more coffee, which means more caffeine-fueled debates? Just what the world needed!.
• Headline: Florian II Wins Matanzas Handicap. Impact: Florian II's win triggered a betting frenzy that led to the establishment of the 'Racing Odds' app, which has since caused more broken friendships than Monopoly. Fact: Did you know that horse racing is basically the world's most glamorous version of 'Guess Who?'—just with more hay and fewer glasses?.
• Headline: MARJORIE BEMIS ENGAGED; Chestnut Hill, Mass., Girl to Be Wed to Arthur Perry Jr.. Impact: Marjorie’s engagement sparked a trend that led to the rise of extravagant wedding blogs, which now feature more flower arrangements than actual flowers in nature. Fact: Engagements: the only time people care about your relationship status more than you do!.
• Headline: BARBARA R. WORTH ENGAGED TO MARRY; PROSPECTIVE BRIDE. Impact: Barbara's engagement inspired hundreds of wedding-themed hashtags, leading to social media influencers being born in their wake, with the phrase 'engaged' becoming synonymous with 'free marketing opportunity.'. Fact: Did you know that getting engaged is essentially a public service announcement for all your friends to start planning their own weddings?.
• Headline: ESKIMO AGAIN WINS ICE YACHT CONTEST; Hatchet Brand Pilots Craft Home 15 Seconds Ahead of Pirate on the Navesink STRATEGY HELPS VICTOR Sheet Tender Slips Off Just Before Start of Race for President's Trophy Skid on Their Ears Brown Offers Trophy Fails to Finish Course Postponement Is Ordered. Impact: The Eskimo's win led to a sudden surge in ice yacht popularity, which in turn inspired a wave of winter sports, resulting in the modern-day obsession with Nordic skiing and questionable fashion choices. Fact: Ice yachting: because why just freeze your toes off when you can do it at 30 mph?.
• Headline: LINKING OF JEWS TO REDS ASSAILED; American Committee's Report Says 'Canard' Was Borrowed From Nazi Propaganda MORE RELIGION IS URGED Dr. Cyrus Adler Sees Need for Strengthening Jewish Institutions in U.S. False Charge" Denounced Nazis Blamed for Depression. Impact: This report’s condemnation of baseless accusations led to a movement toward more thoughtful discourse, though it took several decades and a lot of shouting before anyone actually listened. Fact: It's fascinating how misinformation can travel faster than the truth, like the world's least helpful relay race.
• Headline: Accepts Queens College Post. Impact: Taking that faculty position led to a chain reaction of academic appointments that ultimately resulted in a world where students ask their professors for TikTok advice instead of academic guidance. Fact: Did you know that teaching at a college is basically just a fancy way of saying you get paid to have discussions that could also happen at a coffee shop?.
• Headline: STILLWAGON'S AUTO FIRST; Rockville Center Driver Takes Midget Race at Coliseum. Impact: This thrilling race spurred a frenzy of mini-car enthusiasts, leading to the eventual rise of go-kart racing as a legitimate sport—because clearly, we needed more ways to feel like children in adult bodies. Fact: Midget racing: where speed meets the realization that your car is likely still bigger than your self-esteem!.