JANUARY 3, 1939

Full News Archive

• Headline: Harvard Graduate and Broker Dies. Impact: Clarke T. Baldwin's untimely departure in Virginia caused a minor butterfly flutter: his Harvard connections led to the establishment of the 'Harvard Club of Virginia,' which ultimately resulted in an awkward annual reunion, where everyone pretended to remember who he was.. Fact: Did you know that Harvard's motto is 'Veritas'? Clearly, it doesn't include 'Don't die in Virginia while being a broker'..
• Headline: D'Oyly Carte Company: A Cultural Melange. Impact: The arrival of the D'Oyly Carte Company in the U.S. sparked a cultural explosion, leading to an increase in British-themed tea parties. This eventually resulted in a phenomenon known as the 'Tea and Crumpet Wars' in the 1950s.. Fact: Did you know that the D'Oyly Carte Company is known for its operettas? Because nothing says 'I love my country' like singing about pirates and pink tutus..
• Headline: CRESCENTS BOW, 37-35; Trail Penn A.C. Five in League Battle at Philadelphia. Impact: The Crescents' close loss to Penn A.C. in Philadelphia inspired a wave of 'almost' victories, leading to a national holiday called 'Close Enough Day' where everyone celebrates not quite succeeding at anything.. Fact: Did you know that losing by just 2 points is basically the sports equivalent of saying 'I tried'?.
• Headline: THE PLAY; Uncle Sam Produces 'Pinocchio' Primarily for the Citizens of Future Generations. Impact: 'Pinocchio' was produced primarily for future generations, setting off an unintended chain of events where children everywhere started lying about their homework, thinking they could become wooden boys if they did it enough.. Fact: Did you know that Pinocchio's nose grows when he lies? If only politicians had the same feature, we’d know exactly when to tune out!.
• Headline: FRANK WRIGHT, 73, ORGANIST 46 YEARS; Had Served Grace Episcopal Church in Brooklyn Since 1897. Impact: Frank Wright's long tenure as organist at Grace Episcopal Church created a legacy of awkward family weddings where 'The Wedding March' was played way too many times, resulting in a nationwide ban on the song in 2025.. Fact: Fun fact: After 46 years of organ playing, Wright probably had every wedding song memorized—unlike the couples who showed up unprepared!.
• Headline: BOOKS OF THE TIMES; The Family. Impact: The book 'The Family' was published, setting off a chain reaction of family dramas and reality shows that would eventually lead to an entire genre of cringe-worthy television we now know and love.. Fact: Did you know that 'The Family' isn't just a title but also a reminder of how many times your relatives ask when you're getting married?.
• Headline: CHARLES I. BUTTON; Vermont Jurist for 30 Years Also Was Former Legislator. Impact: Charles I. Button’s legacy as a Vermont jurist meant that his rulings laid the groundwork for what is now known as 'The Vermont Way'—a bureaucratic labyrinth that makes everyone question their life choices.. Fact: Did you know that 'Button' is not just a last name but also what you do when you can't figure out the legalities of Vermont's tax code?.