AUGUST 5, 1938

Full News Archive

• Headline: Lord Dunsany's 'Alexander' at Malvern. Impact: The introduction of Dunsany's play inspired a generation of aspiring playwrights to believe that cryptic, poetic dialogue would become mainstream. Spoiler alert: It didn't, but it did create a lot of awkward dinner conversations.. Fact: Lord Dunsany was basically the hipster of his time, writing plays that only a select few truly understood while the rest of us were just trying to figure out how to pronounce his name..
• Headline: VANDERBILT YACHT LEADS FIRST RUN; American Y. C. Fleet Cruise to Port Jefferson From Rye Paced by Prestige NORTHERN LIGHT VICTOR Beats Nyala by Four Seconds on Handicap in the Large Racing Division Some Only Seconds Apart Prestige Gains Lead THE SUMMARIES. Impact: This yacht race inspired a new trend of wealthy people racing their yachts for bragging rights, ultimately leading to the development of reality TV shows where rich people make poor decisions on the high seas. Thanks, Vanderbilt!. Fact: Ever wonder why yacht races are so intense? Because nothing says 'I love you' like a four-second lead in a race that costs more than your house!.
• Headline: THE SCREEN; ' Mother Carey's Chickens' Opens at the Music Hall-'The Crowd Roars' and 'Passport Husband' Shown At the Capitol At the Palace. Impact: The opening of these films caused a brief resurgence in chicken-themed cinema and passport-related shenanigans. Unfortunately, it didn't lead to an actual passport for your pet chicken, which was a missed opportunity.. Fact: If you think 'Mother Carey's Chickens' is just a charming title, think again. It's like an early version of 'Game of Thrones'—except with more feathers and less betrayal..
• Headline: DR. EDWARD BROQUET; Bronx Physician Had Practiced for 50 Years-Dies at 80. Impact: Dr. Broquet's long career meant that countless patients were denied the opportunity to complain about their ailments to a new doctor. His passing created a void, leading to a rise in 'Dr. Google' diagnoses. Thanks, Doc!. Fact: After 50 years of practice, you'd think Dr. Broquet would have figured out how to cure a cold. Instead, he just mastered the art of nodding thoughtfully while you spoke..
• Headline: Topics of The Times; Blue Velvet Men? Never Say Die Economics and Temper Our Armored Cars Not Class War. Impact: This headline sparked a philosophical debate that lasted for decades about whether it was better to have armored cars or just really good insurance. Spoiler: people still chose armored cars.. Fact: If you ever wondered why economics are so complicated, just remember: it's like trying to explain why a blue velvet suit is a fashion statement. Nobody really gets it..
• Headline: FAVORED NATIONS BUY MORE U.S. GOODS; Exports to 16 With Reciprocal Trade Agreements Show 66.2% Increase OTHERS GAIN ONLY 44.2% Imports Under the Treaties, Says Commerce Department, Moved Up 26.2 Per Cent Rise Began in 1936 Rearmament a Factor Month's Exports Compared. Impact: This trade increase inadvertently led to the rise of the 'Buy American' movement, which somehow convinced everyone that the best way to boost the economy was to buy a ridiculous amount of T-shirts with eagles on them.. Fact: Trade agreements: where 16 nations agree to buy American goods, and the rest are left wondering why their imported goods come with a side of freedom fries..