JULY 15, 1938

Full News Archive

• Headline: Food Served During Notable 1938 Visit. Impact: The food served during this visit sparked a culinary revolution, leading to a world where kale smoothies and avocado toast reign supreme. Little did they know, this would eventually cause a global avocado shortage in 2023, creating chaos among brunch enthusiasts everywhere.. Fact: In the future, people will put so much emphasis on what they eat that they'll throw tantrums if their quinoa isn't organic. Welcome to the age of picky eaters!.
• Headline: Nassau Golfers Triumph in 1938 Championship. Impact: Mrs. Meenan's golf triumph ignited a fierce rivalry among women golfers, eventually leading to the creation of the Women's Golf Association. This paved the way for future generations where golf would be seen as a sport for all, rather than just an elite pastime for retirees.. Fact: Golf was originally played with stones and sticks. Imagine the chaos if they had stuck with that; we'd have a lot more broken windows in suburban neighborhoods..
• Headline: IRA B. AUSTIN; Former Fire Commissioner and Trustee of Pleasantville. Impact: Ira B. Austin's contributions to the fire department led to the establishment of stricter fire safety regulations, which would save countless lives in the years to come. Who knew a fire commissioner could become a hero?. Fact: In the future, fire drills will be a thing of the past, as kids will have been taught to just 'drop and roll' their way to safety. Thanks, Ira!.
• Headline: PROS FIX $5,000 MINIMUM; Figure Set for 72-Hole Tourneys With Certain Exceptions. Impact: Setting a minimum purse for tournaments may have seemed trivial, but it led to the rise of professional sports as a lucrative career, eventually causing millions of kids to aspire to be 'that one guy who plays golf for a living.'. Fact: Today, some athletes make more money in a single game than most people do in a year. Welcome to the new world where sports are treated like a rock concert!.
• Headline: Mrs. H. L. Bogert Jr. Has Son. Impact: The birth of Mrs. H. L. Bogert Jr.'s son marked the start of a family tree destined for greatness or mediocrity, depending on whether he inherited his mother's golf skills or her knack for baking.. Fact: In the world of parenting, every child is a potential future genius or a future reality TV star. Let's hope for the former!.
• Headline: GREYHOUND UNITS WIN BUS LOAN ISSUE PLEA; I. C. C. Approves $4,200,000 Notes for Equipment. Impact: The approval of the Greyhound loan issue signaled a turning point for public transportation, leading to a future where people would actually consider taking the bus instead of their cars, thus reducing traffic congestion in major cities—eventually.. Fact: In a world obsessed with speed, the bus still remains the slowest form of transportation. But hey, at least you can catch up on your social media while stuck in traffic!.
• Headline: BOY WINS SWIFTLY IN CHECKER MATCH; Charles Wengrovsky, 13, Coolly Downs Opponents in Park Play in Manhattan Winner Arrived Late Swept Men Off in Groups. Impact: Young Charles Wengrovsky's checker match victory inspired a generation to embrace board games, leading to an unexpected boom in family game nights and a significant increase in the sales of snacks.. Fact: In the future, competitive board gaming will become a serious sport, right alongside chess, with fans passionately arguing over the best strategies for a game of Connect Four..