JULY 13, 1938

Full News Archive

• Headline: Historic Fence Whitewashing Contest. Impact: This legendary whitewashing contest eventually inspired a generation of boys to pursue careers as fence painters, transforming fence aesthetics worldwide. Who knew a few splatters could lead to the invention of the DIY home improvement movement?. Fact: Did you know that the first documented instance of a fence being whitewashed was actually a prank? Seems like kids have been causing mischief for centuries!.
• Headline: American Beaten by Mine Strikers in 1938. Impact: Thomas Lewis's unfortunate encounter became the rallying cry for strikers everywhere, leading to the formation of the 'Knocked Out by Strikers' union. They still meet every Tuesday for therapy and to discuss their bruises.. Fact: Did you know that getting knocked unconscious was actually a popular pastime in the early 20th century? Just kidding, but it seems like it was a pretty rough time!.
• Headline: La Guardia Defies Picket Lines in 1938. Impact: La Guardia’s questionable choice to cross the picket line sparked a series of events that would eventually lead to the invention of the phrase 'political suicide'. His career never fully recovered, but hey, at least he got a good hot dog at the fair!. Fact: Did you know that La Guardia was also known for his love of radio? Maybe he was just tuning into the 'Picket Line Blues' station while crossing!.
• Headline: JAMES J. NETTERVILLE. Impact: Netterville's long life served as an inspiration for numerous 'living legend' documentaries, culminating in a reality show where contestants vie to live as long as he did, but with fewer life lessons.. Fact: Did you know that 93 years old is the new 73? At least, that's what all the centenarians are saying to feel better about themselves!.
• Headline: Mrs. Margaret Vranian, 101, Dies. Impact: Mrs. Vranian's passing marked the end of an era, sending shockwaves through the local knitting circle. Rumor has it they now require a 101-year-old minimum age to join, just to keep up with her legacy.. Fact: Did you know that 101 is considered the new 100? It seems like age is just a number, especially if you have a good moisturizer!.
• Headline: VENEZUELA QUITS LEAGUE; Action Held Due to Belief Geneva Has Been Weakened. Impact: Venezuela's exit from the League was the first domino to fall in a long series of 'we're better off without you' scenarios in international relations, eventually leading to a global game of political dodgeball.. Fact: Did you know that withdrawing from international organizations was once thought to be a sign of strength? Now it’s just called ‘ghosting’ on a global scale!.
• Headline: MISS EDITH GROOME ENGAGED TO MARRY; She Will Become the Bride of Jean A. Collin on Oct. 11. Impact: Edith Groome’s engagement sparked a nationwide trend of extravagant wedding announcements, leading to the invention of Pinterest boards, and ultimately, a society obsessed with bridal color palettes.. Fact: Did you know that engagement announcements used to be a simple affair? Now they come with hashtags, filters, and more drama than a soap opera!.
• Headline: Heads State Catholic Group. Impact: The heads of the State Catholic Group formed a coalition that would later be known for their impressive potluck dinners, which unintentionally led to the rise of the church bake sale phenomenon.. Fact: Did you know that church bake sales have funded more community projects than government grants? Who knew cookies could be so powerful?.
• Headline: HUGHES AIDED BY GERMANS; Press Lauds Him and Cites His Thanks for Radio Help. Impact: Hughes’s gratitude towards the Germans for their radio assistance led to a bizarre friendship and a global radio network that played nothing but polka music for a decade. It was a hit, until it wasn’t.. Fact: Did you know that radio waves can travel through space? Too bad they didn’t send Hughes a signal to keep his gratitude to himself!.
• Headline: HOSPITAL GAINS BY PARTY; Sea Girt Alliance Sponsors Card Benefit at Shore. Impact: The Sea Girt Alliance's card benefit was the first of its kind, eventually leading to the rise of fundraiser bingo nights, where the stakes were high and the snacks were questionable.. Fact: Did you know that card parties used to be a way to throw shade? Now they're just a way to raise funds and eat stale chips!.