MAY 20, 1938

Full News Archive

• Headline: Public Disregard for Recovery Funding Debate. Impact: The public ignoring vital issues led to a future where politicians could confidently propose the most ridiculous ideas without fear of backlash. This, in turn, paved the way for a reality TV star to run for president. Thanks, public apathy!. Fact: Krock’s comments were so vital that they were probably filed under 'Things No One Cares About' in the Congressional archives..
• Headline: Honoring Mrs. Edward T. Canby. Impact: Mrs. Ella A S Canby's life and death made it clear that being a welfare leader is a thankless job. This further pushed society towards the 'let someone else handle it' mentality, which is still thriving today.. Fact: Mrs. Canby is now remembered as the unsung hero who probably made more sandwiches for charity events than anyone else in history..
• Headline: AUTO WRECK INJURES EDUCATOR, DOCTOR; Third Man Also Is Seriously Hurt in Parkway Crash. Impact: This auto wreck was a critical moment that demonstrated how educators and doctors are often too busy saving lives to be safe themselves. It also opened the door for new safety regulations, because clearly, we needed to learn the hard way.. Fact: In a twist of fate, this crash spurred the invention of the first educational bumper sticker: 'Stay in your lane!'.
• Headline: UNION CONFERENCE REJECTS SOVIET BID; Refuses to Accept Membership of Russian Groups in the International Council. Impact: The rejection of the Soviet bid set the stage for decades of Cold War drama, complete with secret agents, spy novels, and more than a few terrible movies. Thanks, International Council, for all the entertainment!. Fact: This rejection probably made a lot of coffee breaks awkward in the International Council meeting rooms..
• Headline: DR. SINCLAIR SMITH, SCIENTIST, DIES AT 39; Noted for His Work on Telescope at California Tech. Impact: Dr. Sinclair Smith's untimely death at 39 left a gap in the scientific community that would lead to countless conspiracy theories about what he might have discovered had he lived longer. Spoiler: it was probably just better telescopes.. Fact: Smith's work on telescopes was so influential that it made stargazing cool, transforming countless nerds into 'astronomers'..
• Headline: RUSH NAVY SHIP TEST TANK; Officials Speed New Plant for Experimenting With Models. Impact: The rush to test models for navy ships led to a series of naval innovations that eventually resulted in the creation of the world's first aquatically-themed amusement park. Who knew naval engineering would end in roller coasters?. Fact: Carderock, Maryland, is now the go-to spot for anyone who wanted to test their ships without the inconvenience of actually going to sea..
• Headline: MRS. WILFRED GRAHAM; Woodmere, L.I., Welfare Leader, Honored Wednesday, Dies. Impact: Mrs. Wilfred Graham's contributions to welfare were sadly overshadowed by the ongoing struggle for social justice, which still continues. Her legacy is a reminder that some people just can’t catch a break.. Fact: Mrs. Graham probably organized more bake sales than anyone else on Long Island, yet somehow, no one remembers her famous chocolate chip cookies..
• Headline: ANDREW J. MILLER. Impact: Andrew J. Miller's life might not have changed the world, but his name was probably one of many that contributed to the realization that being 'just another guy' is a common theme throughout history.. Fact: There are literally thousands of Andrew J. Millers in history, and none of them have ever been the hero in a story. Oops!.