DECEMBER 20, 1937

Full News Archive

• Headline: Call for Peace in 1937. Impact: The call for peace sparked a global movement, inadvertently leading to the invention of yoga pants, which became a symbol of both relaxation and the rise of athleisure. Who knew peace could be so fashionable?. Fact: It's ironic how urging for peace often leads to a fashion revolution. Maybe we should have just stuck with tie-dye.
• Headline: J.L. Schlesinger Becomes Newark Real Estate President. Impact: Schlesinger's elevation to presidency led to a series of questionable real estate deals that ultimately inspired a reality TV show about brokers who can’t sell houses without using smoke and mirrors. Fact: Being a real estate broker is basically just a fancy way of saying you know how to write persuasive emails and make awkward small talk.
• Headline: WARNS AGAINST BOYCOTT; Dr. Neumann Says It Would Intensify Japanese Nationalism. Impact: Dr. Neumann's warning against boycotting Japanese materials sparked a global trend of people boycotting everything—because who doesn’t love a good protest when they can just scroll on social media instead?. Fact: Boycotting is like a group project where no one does their part, but everyone feels really self-righteous about it.
• Headline: SPANISH LOYALISTS DRIVE INTO TERUEL AFTER BIG AIR RAID; House-to-HouseFightingMarks Occupation as Rebels Refuse Surrender. Impact: The fierce fighting in Teruel became a symbol of stubbornness, inspiring countless memes about not giving up, even when the weather is against you. House-to-house fighting? More like house-to-house 'let’s just agree to disagree.'. Fact: Blizzards have a way of making even the most heated arguments feel a little chilly. Literally.
• Headline: GERMANS SUSPICIOUS OF PANAY DISPATCHES; McDonald in Story to Times of London Seen as Attempting to Stir Up Americans. Impact: The German suspicion over Panay dispatches led to a flurry of conspiracy theories, which eventually inspired a whole genre of thriller novels that still confuse readers to this day. Fact: Suspicion in politics is as old as time; it’s just that now we have social media to amplify our paranoia.
• Headline: DR. PERRY DELIVERS VALEDICTORY SERMON; Retiring Episcopal Presiding Bishop Speaks in Capital-To Be Here Tomorrow. Impact: Dr. Perry's valedictory sermon set off a chain reaction of retirements in the religious community that led to an annual 'Best Retirement Speech' award. Spoiler alert: no one has ever won it without a few tears. Fact: Retirement speeches are like the Oscars for clergy—everyone is just waiting to see who cries first.
• Headline: LONDON MAY SEEK NAVY AID IN PARIS; Closer Accord Stressed as Need for Protection in North Sea and Mediterranean. Impact: London's desire for naval aid inadvertently led to a series of naval-themed reality shows, where contestants have to build ships out of recycled materials. Because who doesn’t want to see a sinking ship in HD?. Fact: Naval battles in reality TV often involve more drama than actual strategy. Think of it as Survivor but with more water and fewer mosquitoes.
• Headline: Appeal to Crowd Discussed. Impact: The discussion on appealing to crowds led to the rise of motivational speakers, which ultimately resulted in a global epidemic of people yelling 'You can do it!' at everyone else. Fact: Crowds are great for energy… until you realize everyone is just there for the free snacks.
• Headline: MAY CONTEST ELECTION; Conservative Candidate Urged by Publisher in Colombia. Impact: M.O. Perez's potential presidential run in Colombia set off a wave of political aspirations from people who had never run for office before, leading to a reality show called 'Who Wants to Be a Politician?'. Fact: In politics, being urged to run is often the equivalent of being told your cooking is great—everybody's polite, but nobody really means it.