NOVEMBER 5, 1937

Full News Archive

• Headline: Van Loon Elected Authors Guild President. Impact: When Van Loon took the helm of the Authors Guild, he inadvertently set off a chain reaction that led to the rise of self-published authors claiming they are 'the next Hemingway'—and thus ignited the modern era of e-books and questionable writing.. Fact: Did you know that Van Loon once claimed he could write a bestseller in his sleep? Too bad the world hasn't seen that manuscript yet..
• Headline: Nationalization of Standard Oil Lands in Mexico. Impact: The nationalization of Standard Oil marked the beginning of a delightful tug-of-war between countries and corporations, leading to the rise of countless legal battles that would make even the most boring courtroom dramas seem thrilling.. Fact: Did you know that Standard Oil was so big it could probably buy a small country? Oh wait, it tried that too—multiple times..
• Headline: McCURN NAMED JUSTICE; Governor Appoints Syracuse Judge to Supreme Court, 5th Distriot. Impact: McCurn's appointment to the Supreme Court led to a series of rulings that made everyone wonder if the judicial process was just a game of 'hot potato'—with the fate of justice hanging in the balance.. Fact: Did you know that McCurn's favorite pastime was arguing with himself? It prepared him well for the Supreme Court!.
• Headline: ALEKHINE DOWNED BY EUWE AT CHESS; World Champion Takes 13th Match After 68 Plays to Shorten Rival's Lead. Impact: Alekhine's chess defeat not only shook the chess community but also inspired a generation of players to realize that even the greatest can fall—leading to a surge in chess enthusiasm and countless overconfident amateurs at coffee shops.. Fact: Did you know that after losing, Alekhine was so upset he almost threw his chessboard out the window? But then he remembered he had to play again tomorrow..
• Headline: Dodge's Aides Clean Out Desks Carefully Lest Dewey Find Notes That Need Explaining. Impact: Dodge's aides cleaning out desks foreshadowed the inevitable chaos of political transitions, proving that in politics, it’s not just about who you know, but who you can outrun.. Fact: Did you know that cleaning out desks is now a common practice for political aides? It’s like spring cleaning but with more backstabbing..
• Headline: Firestone Rubber Unit Formed. Impact: The formation of Firestone's Rubber Unit led to the bizarre obsession with tires that would eventually result in countless late-night infomercials about 'the latest tire technology'—because who doesn't want to hear about rubber at 2 AM?. Fact: Did you know that Firestone once tried to market a rubber chicken? It flopped harder than expected, proving that not all rubber products are created equal..
• Headline: PHILADELPHIA VOTE MAY GO TO COURTS; Republicans Plan to Seek Recount on Charges of Widespread Fraud and Error. Impact: The recount in Philadelphia introduced the concept of 'voter skepticism,' leading to a future where every election would be accompanied by a side of conspiracy theories and the occasional social media meltdown.. Fact: Did you know that the only thing more contentious than a Philadelphia election is a Philadelphia cheesesteak debate?.