JULY 4, 1937

Full News Archive

• Headline: Review of 'Man in a Chemical World'. Impact: If only A. Cressey Morrison had known that his chemical musings would lead to a 21st-century obsession with organic avocado toast, perhaps he would have made a different career choice.. Fact: Did you know that chemical compounds can also lead to explosive arguments at dinner parties? Just ask anyone who's ever mentioned gluten-free diets..
• Headline: Terror Strikes San Juan July 4 Celebration. Impact: The bombing in San Juan set off a chain reaction that eventually led to the invention of the modern piñata—because who doesn’t want to celebrate while simultaneously dodging potential explosives?. Fact: Did you know that the Fourth of July was originally celebrated with fireworks and not bomb threats? Good to see we've evolved..
• Headline: Retail Buyers Optimistic for Fall Purchases. Impact: The optimistic retail buyers set the stage for the inevitable rise of online shopping, where consumers can now buy last year's budgets at a discount—because who needs to be timely?. Fact: Fun fact: Retail optimism is usually just code for 'We really hope people forget last year's disaster.'.
• Headline: PUSHES PANAMA LOCKS; Canal Zone Governor Establishes Engineering Group for 3d Set. Impact: The Panama Canal's engineering feats inspired countless future projects, including the construction of a new bathroom in my house that took three years and involved far less water.. Fact: Did you know that the Panama Canal is often referred to as the 'Eighth Wonder of the World'? That’s just one less wonder than my neighbor's DIY home improvement projects..
• Headline: Yugoslavia Plans New Coins. Impact: Yugoslavia's new coins inspired a global trend where countries melted down their old currency—leading to a shortage of coins that would later make arcade games impossible to play.. Fact: Did you know that melting down coins was once considered a great way to save on change? Now it’s just called 'turning your entire life savings into a bunch of shiny paperweights.'.
• Headline: FAVOR GARMENT ADVANCE; Firms Oppose 'Cheapening' Lines to Meet Rise in Labor Cost. Impact: The garment firms' decision to resist cheapening their lines led to the rise of fast fashion, because who doesn’t love a good dress that falls apart after one wash?. Fact: Did you know that resisting cheapening lines is just corporate-speak for 'We want to charge you more for the same stuff'? Welcome to capitalism!.
• Headline: NEW RIIS PARK SPAN IS OPENED BY MAYOR; He Pays High Tribute to Moses at Dedication of Bridge Over Rockaway Inlet. Impact: The opening of the new Riis Park span gave rise to the idea that bridges could also serve as social media hotspots, where people gather to post pictures of their lunch.. Fact: Did you know that mayors often get bridges built to remind us that they can, in fact, build something useful? Unlike the potholes we have to dodge on the way there..
• Headline: SMALL-FIRM CREDIT SHIFTS TO INDUSTRY; Large Producers Taking Over Financing Formerly Done by Nation's Banks. Impact: The shift in credit from small-firm financing to large producers created a future where small businesses would be consistently outbid at every loan application, setting the tone for the next economic crisis.. Fact: Did you know that large producers taking over credit is just the universe's way of saying 'Good luck making your dreams come true, small fry!'?.